Queen of the Tearling Made Me Cry… From Boredom

queen of the tearling

I didn’t know how to do this review- cos this book was just so lacklustre for me that even the thought of it made me spiral into a state of mind-numbing boredom. So I decided to get a little creative and wrote the script for a potential honest book trailer. Enjoy!

*Puts on booming trailer voice*

In a world that makes no sense, meet a heroine that’s so boring, you will want to cry.

Watch (or rather read) as she reads fast…

read fast.gif

Skin a rabbit…

Bugs9.gif

And rides a horse…

horse riding.gif

All as she prepares to be the queen of the shittiest kingdom ever invented. (Seriously this kingdom sucks so much I have absolutely no idea why someone would want to conquer it)

You will be on the edge of your seat waiting for the anti-climactic, non-events of their journey to the capital to come to fruition… All of which will make you wonder:

are we nearly there yet.png

(and this is coming from someone who thinks watching 9 hours of hobbits wandering around Middle Earth is entertaining)

Wait around for occasional appearances from the villain who is too “busy” (*ahem*) with her slaves to actually get involved in the plot, even while the heroine constantly provokes her…

pay attention to me.gif

And be vaguely dissatisfied by magic being used sporadically as convenient plot devices- just so this book can get the label of being the next “Hunger Games and Game of Thrones” rolled into one (if you believe that you’ll believe anything)

Annnd that’s about it. As you can probably tell, I did not enjoy this book. It wasn’t the worst book I’ve ever read but I can’t give it more than…

Rating: 2/5 bananas

half bananahalf banana

Alright so I know this book’s pretty popular- but let me know in the comments what *you* thought about it! Like it? Dislike it? Let me know!

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40 thoughts on “Queen of the Tearling Made Me Cry… From Boredom

  1. Bookstooge says:

    Man, I love reviews like this.

    Books like this make me wonder if Publishers are just scraping the bottom of the barrel for fear that the “Next Big Thing” might come from an indie on Amazon.
    And who in their right mind would EVER put Hunger Games and Game of Thrones together?

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Krysta says:

    Well, that title didn’t go where I thought it was going! I remember liking this book but I guess not too much because I’ve never bothered looking into the sequel? Also I don’t remember anything that happened and I don’t want to reread it because it’s rather long.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Maddie A. says:

    I love this review! I was reading it using Honest Trailer Guy from Youtube’s voice (I don’t know his name haha) 😀 😀
    This book is on my TBR list but I haven’t read it yet. I probably won’t read it now after this review 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Nicola Alter says:

    Oh no, there’s a version of this with a super pretty cover that I was hoping to proudly add to my shelf… but it seems if I did it might end up being pure decoration! Haven’t read it yet but your review is not confidence inspiring… it is hilarious though 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  5. LizScanlon says:

    i’m nearly halfway through the final book in the series… i rather enjoyed the first book, though, heck yeah, it has issues… book 2 annoyed me amd book 3 this far…
    if anything I’m reading and in parts going-yeah, balblablah, lets move on!
    loved your review, can’t wait to write my own for the trilogy… i’m liking t more than you but the issues I have wih the trilogy are too funny to not write about! 😁

    Liked by 1 person

  6. hiraethforthepages says:

    i had kind of wanted to read this for a while but I never just seemed to get around to it and my excitement kind of decreased and now it has seemed to go further down the list. I probably will still get around in giving it a read sometime but this trailer is extraorfdinary and I think at the moment I enjoy watching it more than reading the book haha!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Sam says:

    Queen of the Tearling was so bad, I’m kind of embarrassed that I paid money for it. I need to find some way to sneak it out of my house before anyone notices.

    Like

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