*Every day I’m going to possess strangers and stalk you till you love me*

 

every day love story

So I watched the movie version of Every Day and *wowwww* I had thoughts on it- so rather than doing a review, which would inevitably get me in trouble with book-stans, I thought it would be more fun to do my own honest version of this “super progressive” horrible story- ya know, to get myself in EVEN MORE trouble with book stans 😉 For people that don’t know this book, the basic plot is that a spirit called A takes over a body every day- there’s a bunch of complicated rules for this, but all you really need to know is A can possess anyone in the same age category- which sounds like an okay premise… until you realise it’s YA so there *has to* be a love story. Cos of course. Now you can probably see the problems that might arise here- however for the sake of entertainment (and in case you can’t see the issue), I’ve decided to rewrite this with a relatively sane human being as the female lead (I know, that’s so out there, it’ll  almost make this story almost unbelievable). Enjoy! (or ya know, throw rocks in my general direction cos SATIRE IS EVIL!)

maleficent laughing

Day 1

“Oh hello there, I didn’t see you. Wait- why are you staring?”

“Because I am your boyfriend.”

There is a peculiar glint to his eye and glitter in his hair.

“Er, yeah, I know. What’s the matter with you? Did you dress up as Edward Cullen today?”

He smirks at me, like he knows something I don’t…

“Do you want to skip school?”

“Erm- what?”

“Is this what we usually do together?”

“You’re being weird.”

He bends his head to kiss me and I decide to just go with it- after all it wouldn’t be the first time and it seems like a better idea than talking at any rate. He stops and pulls away, gawking at me with peculiar intensity.

“Can I tell you a secret? I am not your boyfriend- see ya!”

His eyes roll into the back of his head. There’s a gurgling sound in his throat, like rattling chains. Then he looks up at me, the picture of innocence.

“Wh-what just happened?” he asks.

“You tell me,” I reply shakily.

But he does not have an answer.

Day 2

The barrista is giving me side-eye. She seems to gulp several times, perhaps on the words can I take your order… but then she does something unexpected.

“I have something to tell you,” she murmurs in my ear, her voice unnaturally hoarse, her eyes carrying a red glint.

I blink. “Do I know you?”

“You did yesterday.”

“Excuse me,” I say, but the weirdo is already walking away.

I can’t be sure- but I think I see glitter in her hair.

EdwardCullenSunlight
Are you scared yet?

Day 3

I was in Chemistry when it happens again.

“It’s me.”

The bloke in front of me has one of those forgettable faces- maybe that’s why he looks like a total stranger. Or maybe he’s another wacko. I hedge my bets by saying nothing.

“Let me formally introduce myself. My name’s A. I’m a spirit that jumps from body to body.”

“Righhhht,” I say, edging out of my seat.

He blocks my path.

“Oh I know you don’t recognise me. But that’s okay- I know you. I’ve been… seeing you around a lot lately.”

I half laugh. “Next you’ll be saying you’ve been watching me sleep.”

He stares at me pointedly, a red gleam in his gaze.

I kick him in the shin and flee- what else was I supposed to do?

Day 4

A is a girl today. And yes, I’ve decided to just go with the whole A thing- if I’m being punked it’ll make for better TV. Besides, there’s that whole red-eye thing.

“Do you have a type?” she/he/it says.

“I’m not attracted to you,” I reply flatly.

“Who cares! I’m attracted to you. Are you too up yourself to be with me?”

I roll my eyes so far back into my head I feel I must look like the scary one. If only.

eye roll

Day 5

A does not bother me today. Thank god.

Day 6

“I’m sorry I wasn’t around yesterday, the kid I was in was having a lung operation. Wait- why are you running away again?”  

Day 7

I track down one of A’s victims. It was all over the local news: boy wakes up in ditch and claims he was possessed by a demon. They’re saying he’s crazy, looking for attention. I know the truth.

“I think he might have been the devil,” the boy whispers.

“You’re probably right,” I reply incautiously- then look around. I grab a pen and scribble a note in case it’s listening: “It’s stalking me! Send help!”

Day 8

“Do you not like me cos I’m fat today?”

Day 9

“Do you not like nose rings? At least I have a great butt!”

Day 10
ali g

Day 11

“BIGOT!!!!”

Day 12

It’s inside me. I watch from behind my eyes as A stares at my naked form in the mirror. I am helpless, exposed, furious. Perhaps it feels it too. A opens my mouth and screams:

“WHY DON’T YOU LOVE ME!”

Mum comes upstairs.

“Sorry, I’m not available to chat right now,” A hisses with my stolen tongue and slams the door in her face.

Boy, am I going to pay for that later.

Day 13

“Look I’m sorry I landed you in a psych ward. I may have taken things too far.”

“It’s okay,” I say, even though my hands won’t sit still. “I’ve spoken to someone about… you.”

“Is this the part where you tell me you never want to see me again?”

I close my eyes, remember what the priest told me and repeat it word for word: “I’m asexual,” I say with as much confidence as I can muster.

The shock is visible on the demon’s face; the red glint and glitter instantly begin to fade.

“Forgive me, I should have a-s-k-k-k…”

But it’s too late. I’ve said the magic words. The gender-bending demon is banished by the supreme power of progressive top trumps. The end!  

curtsey

NB this isn’t a critique of the book cos I haven’t read it and NOT GONNA READ IT- even if you pinky swear it’s better than the adaptation. And, having read reviews, both the book and movie seem to believe that having the protagonist say “but you stalked me and kissed me against my will” somehow makes it a-okay. Sorry, no. Pointing out a problem doesn’t fix it. Ultimately, the creepy spirit violated many, many people’s consent. And no amount of pointing that out is gonna erase it. If you love this book, then fine, I’m sure I won’t convince you otherwise- but, yeesh, this went so far over the line for me. I’ll get off my soapbox now 😉

26 thoughts on “*Every day I’m going to possess strangers and stalk you till you love me*

  1. LOL this post is great. TBH I read this book in early high school and loved it and completely missed all the issues with consent (because I was a child and had never had it pointed out to me). And rereading it now, I still love it, but mainly for nostalgia reasons. I can definitely see all the issues, and I definitely question Rhiannon’s reaction to most things.

    I’ve only watched the first maybe 35 minutes of the movie, and I think it was way worse than the book. I mean, the book isn’t great, but everything comes across as creepier in the movie IMO.

    One thing I do like about the book that I think was missing from the movie is it has a cool exploration of what counts as love/attraction, and how gender and sexuality influence those things. I thought it was super interesting to see both A and Rhiannon struggle with it. That being said, I think if you didn’t like the movie, you probably won’t like the book either and it’s not worth reading.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. hehe thank you 😉 I can understand that, I think it’s probably better in book form. But I think it’s definitely worth questioning. I think that once it’s put on screen it comes across pretty badly.

      I think it was interesting that the author tried to explore that topic for sure- it’s just a shame it throws up way too many issues in his exploration of it (consent for instance, being allowed a preference). hehe yeah I can’t imagine I would, so I’m not gonna bother tbh.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Great post! I read the book and thought it was great… but at the same time, it does come across way creepier when you’re watching actual people have their bodies taken over and manipulated by someone else.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh boyyyyy, I did not know that this book/movie was about possession, and YIKES, I’m not going near it with a ten-foot pole now. This was hilarious, thank you!

    Liked by 1 person

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