Love Locked Down Horror Parody

***Because I didn’t see these titles and think “how romantic”***

I am perfectly sane. I’ve just been inside a long while. Watching you from afar. Thinking of you twenty-four hours a. fucking. day. Loving you. Which is perfect sane.

The banging must be real then. It’s not in my head.

The air is close in here. Stale as the Dorito dust soaked into my t shirt. I know I haven’t showered in weeks. Which won’t do- it won’t do at all. You wouldn’t like that. But I comfort myself that at least I’m not dressed in a onesie on a Tuesday afternoon. Like you used to. I used to wonder- were you doing a conference call with the pyjama company?

That noise. It reminds me of the sound you used to make as you clunked around your living room in those great big boots. I could hear them all the way over here. But I didn’t mind. I used to like watching you lose yourself in cooking samosas, tapping your toes to an invisible beat.

Curtains twitch. My eyes dart around your room, trying to catch a glimpse of your ghost. Or whoever’s there now. I make my way around the open space as if I had walked there many times and not just the once.

There is that confounding banging again. It reminds me how alone I am.

I used to wave at you. Grinning from ear to ear. Smiling through tears. Hands thumping together while we applauded the nurses or the dustmen or whatever. We were all in this together back then. That meant a lot. Those are precious memories to me. No one can take them away.

The noise is like a heartbeat now. Da dum, da dum… No that’s not right.

That’s why I went over there after lockdown ended.

Bang! Bang, bang!

Took you by the hand- or maybe by the neck- I can’t remember which.

Bang bang!

And put you in here.


And I won’t let you out.

10 thoughts on “Love Locked Down Horror Parody

  1. I don’t know why but this story had the feels of “The Yellow Wallpaper”. Especially when the narrator says that the “I have put you in here”; it’s like that moment in Perkins’ story when the woman and the woman in the wallpaper blur or become one.

    Liked by 2 people

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