I wish I could dump all these books! Because I’m so tired of toxic tropes and bad romances. And these are in the romance novels we’re supposed to revere. There’s a plethora of unhealthy relationships in books- and I’m here to call it out!
Twilight– it’s not simply that I don’t find sparkly vampires sexy- it’s that I can’t stand Edward’s controlling behaviour, possessiveness and downright stalking. The so-called loving relationship in this series is built on abusive behaviour patterns. Add in the side piece Jacob being EVEN MORE toxic, with his manipulative behaviour and sexual assault, and it’s no surprise this book gets called out for its poor representation of romance.
Fifty Shades of Grey– oh my- I didn’t realise a book could be as bad as this. In all honesty, who is surprised to see this book on here? Christian Grey is a poster boy for billionaire abusers. And this book is a great example of how coercion is not consent.
Beautiful Disaster– Travis is walking red flag- oh but he’s hot, so it’s okay apparently.
The Duke and I– shockingly unromantic. Leaving the communication issues aside, the main character actually believes she has every right to rape her partner… and even blames him for it. Just an icky book.
It Ends With Us– ironically, this book is trying to turn the narrative on its head, by showing us how you can miss the red flags. Unfortunately, I feel like it fails horribly. Making excuses for the abuser, inserting another (unhealthy) relationship in the book (which began when the mc was underage) and deciding to still have contact with the abuser. If you’re looking for a book to shine a light on domestic abuse, this is not it.
Time Traveller’s Wife– because grooming is not romantic.
Foxhole Court– cos the rapey vibes gross me out.
A Court of Thorns and Roses– people say Tamlin’s character was ruined in later books. I disagree. He was too bland to be ruined. The fact that he morphs into an abusive man-child qualifies him for this list. And that’s not even considering the fact that all the so-called “healthy” relationships in this series are completely co-dependent. No one in Maas’ series can cope outside of a relationship it seems. Yet apparently that’s a-okay because they’re “mates” (yeuch).
Normal People– for all its pretention, this is simply a romance book. And a bad one at that. The couple in this are self-centred and treat everyone around them as collateral damage. Their being so ghastly should in fact make them exempt from this list- since I was trying to choose books that were romantic- but I made an exception here because I don’t think we’re actually supposed to view them as vile. Even if they absolutely deserve each other.
The Notebook– call me old-fashioned, but endless shouting matches don’t really scream romantic to me. Apart from the cheating aspect (which is also completely toxic) they simply communicate in a really unpleasant way. Books like this don’t age well.
And that’s it for now! Do you want to dump these books (in a fire) too? Do you have any more to add (to the furnace)? Let me know in the comments!
I couldn’t read through Normal People to the end. The writing is just terrible.
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I agree! it’s awful!
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I actually read The Time Traveller’s Wife when I was younger and enjoyed it because I didn’t know about grooming/see the red flags :p Don’t think I can give it another go to see if my opinions change!
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Yeah I think reading it now just raised so many red flags that I couldn’t enjoy it
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I read November 9th by Colleen Hoover way back in the day. Only one I’ve read, it was ugly toxic. He’s an arsonist (who burned down her house and scarred her). But it’s fine because he’s hot… Bleh. I’m glad to miss out on Maas books. I don’t understand why people keep holding them up as a standard for any genre or category.
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Oh yeah I read that one- it’s horrible
I agree!
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Definitely agree with Twilight, fifty shades (I feel really good not reading this, I watched the first movie and didn’t want to read the books after watching it, EVER), and Time Traveler’s wife.
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Oh I’m so glad you agree with me there!!
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There is one part in Twilight when Edward Breaks Bella’s car so she can’t drive out to see Jacob and even reading that as a teen, I was furious! Everyone else was saying how sweet and romantic it was and I was ranting I would never let anyone keep me trapped in like that.
Maas and co I also find that genre really creepy that it’s hundreds of years old men falling in love with teen girls… It’s a little icky but still a guilty pleasure of mine…
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Oh yeah that’s such controlling behaviour!! And we romanticise that?!?! It’s so awful!
Yeah I get that- and I have the same guilty pleasure… I just sometimes come away feeling icky afterwards
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No I won’t dump them because the ones I have read from your list are big favorites! It makes me wonder why we have such different reads on the same books 🤣
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hahaha!! Yes same!
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Twilight is a moooooood!!! And I’ve never been able to get into Notebook which I’m glad I didn’t. I found another toxic one is Hush Hush and Hating Game. I kinda wish I never read either 😅
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hahaha!! Oh yes I agree with yuo on hush hush- such a bad book!
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I have such mixed feelings on Twilight, because YES to all points, and still, those books are such a big part of pop culture that I feel attached in a weird way. I also absolutely adored The Time Traveler’s Wife way back when, but suspect they’d read differently now (and I don’t want to reread and find out).
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I can understand that (I still watch the movies for nostalgia reasons and would probably do the same with the books if I hadn’t unhauled them)… but it makes me feel weird when I think about them. haha yeah I get that!
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I so agree
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Thank you!!
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Very welcome 🙂
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Give me all the tea 👀👌🏼 I’ll gladly take more if you have!
Luckily havent read any of these, eheh; though I did loved the notebook movie ..
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hahaha!! That’s a lucky break 😉
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Douglas Wilson once reviewed Twilight chapter by chapter because it was so bad.
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hahah it definitely is very bad!
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There definitely seems to be a segment of the reader population who gravitate towards toxic romances, I’ve always just though it’s like an escapism thing, like they love to read about it but not necessarily condone it. I personally don’t get it, but to each their own! 😀
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Yeah I’ve noticed that. And I can understand in some sense- but the problem I have sometimes is that the same people that will condemn one book, will hold up another book as a good example of romance (I saw that so much with people that don’t like Maas but did like the foxhole court for example). I think that we all have guilty pleasures (or maybe not so guilty 😉 ) but it just makes me wonder what makes one book considered toxic and another not.
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I’ve read some of these books and agree with pretty much everything except for It Ends With Us which I personally thought was amazing. I read the whole ACOTAR series and unfortunately the first book was the best – it only goes downhill from there. Tamlin is just horrible but Rhysand isn’t any better!
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