Reading goals can be fun!

Not always, but they can be. Which is why I find the claim that reading goals are not fun to be so absurd. I’ve seen this sort of thing around for a while- there seems to be a lot of discontent around people reading a lot or people planning to read tougher books or even reading “too fast”– and my question is always WHY?! WHAT IS IT TO YOU??? It’s frankly peculiar to care what someone else does with their reading. Criticism of reading successes or goals is so weird- cos it’s such a personal decision… and really has nothing to do with anyone else. But since some people do decide to make other people’s reading habits their business, I’ve decided to make a list of why someone might make reading goals:

#1 Reading goals can help you make your hobby a priority. I know that we all have fast-paced and busy lives, in which fitting in a hobby can be hard (no matter how much you may want to do it). Making a decision to read more books can force you to take some time for yourself! That’s why it’s so great when you see that people have read lots of books- it’s a sign they’re doing something positive for themselves- and that should be celebrated!

#2 More books makes the world go round! The fact is, as supporters of the book community, we should be happy to see people reading… even if that’s a lot more than we could ever read! Because when more people read, it helps the bookish industry, which means more books get published… and isn’t that what we all want? If nothing else, that gives us more choice over what to read next. And on that note…

#3 There’s *so many* books out there– planning your reading might mean you actually get to the ones you want! Of course, quality is better than quantity- but if you can do both, you may as well 😉 I know that for me, it’s a struggle to get through everything I own or borrow, so planning it out (however unsuccessfully) can be helpful.

#4 Books can be for self-improvement– and self-improvement can actually make you happy. Not just the fleeting momentary joy of doing something fun- more like the long-lasting satisfaction of a job well done. But choosing a book for self-improvement might not just happen if you rely solely on mood reading (take it from someone who knows 😉). It can be better to set it as an actual goal.

#5 They can help you branch out into books you might not have tried otherwise. Whatever your goal- whether it’s to read more books from diverse authors or check out poetry collections, actually making the decision to do that can be the step in the right direction.

#6 There’s no real pressure– they’re just for fun. You can make them as realistic or unrealistic as you like. No one has to know unless you want them to. Even if everything is blowing up around you, you can chill out about your reading goals.

#7 And you can’t really fail. I have charted my resolution results and yearly stats for a long time and one thing is the same every time: there’s no real expectation of success or failure. Since it is simply for your own benefit, you can choose to do them at your pleasure. You know what I did when I wasn’t feeling it the last two years? Nothing. I simply didn’t do them.

So, there you go- a list of why it can be run to reads and make reaching goals- if you ever felt you needed an explanation for other people’s reading habits (which as I’ve established, you don’t 😉). And if the thought of someone else’s reading behaviour still brings you out in hives, then you ought to consider this quote:

“What do you think is the biggest waste of time?” “Comparing yourself to others”, said the mole.”

All that considered- what do you think?? Do you care what other people think of your reading habits? Or does it bother you if other people make reading resolutions? Let me know in the comments!

The Importance of Rom Coms!

After all my heartbreaking posts this month, it’s time for something more upbeat! And what could be cheerier than talking about rom coms? Today I want to talk about why I love rom coms and how necessary these kinds of stories are!

Obviously, it has to be said that rom coms make people happy. Guaranteed happily ever afters tend to bring a smile to our faces- and we need more of that in the world. We all need some joyful escapism from time to time!

That doesn’t mean they’re unrealistic- they simply have a more positive dose of realism. While rom coms deal with real world issues, they tend to be more grounded in the kind of things we might come across every day. In fact, the way they include every day problems, rather than world-ending-disasters, makes them truer to life than some gritty dramas (just sayin’).

More than that- love is an inspiring topic! Focusing on relationships, friendships and family connections not only teaches us how to behave, but also gives us an appreciation for what really matters in life. While we can often give more attention to movies about heroism and saving the day, in many ways, it’s more important to think about the small acts of heroism in ordinary lives. And as much as it seems insignificant, love is the power that binds us to each other and makes life worth living. So naturally we crave movies about it!

Rom coms also have a lot more depth than you think! The best rom coms are about growing in our relationships and self-improvement. Even if they’re not taken seriously, there are still far more serious rom coms out there than you realise! (think Shakespeare or Austen 😉) Stories don’t have to end in death to have meaning!

Plus, rom coms are fundamentally fun! They’re relaxing, they’re freeing and they make us laugh! And since laughter is good for you- rom coms must be too! 😉

And that’s all for now! Do you enjoy rom coms? What value do you see in them? Let me know in the comments!

Love Locked Down Horror Parody

***Because I didn’t see these titles and think “how romantic”***

I am perfectly sane. I’ve just been inside a long while. Watching you from afar. Thinking of you twenty-four hours a. fucking. day. Loving you. Which is perfect sane.

The banging must be real then. It’s not in my head.

The air is close in here. Stale as the Dorito dust soaked into my t shirt. I know I haven’t showered in weeks. Which won’t do- it won’t do at all. You wouldn’t like that. But I comfort myself that at least I’m not dressed in a onesie on a Tuesday afternoon. Like you used to. I used to wonder- were you doing a conference call with the pyjama company?

That noise. It reminds me of the sound you used to make as you clunked around your living room in those great big boots. I could hear them all the way over here. But I didn’t mind. I used to like watching you lose yourself in cooking samosas, tapping your toes to an invisible beat.

Curtains twitch. My eyes dart around your room, trying to catch a glimpse of your ghost. Or whoever’s there now. I make my way around the open space as if I had walked there many times and not just the once.

There is that confounding banging again. It reminds me how alone I am.

I used to wave at you. Grinning from ear to ear. Smiling through tears. Hands thumping together while we applauded the nurses or the dustmen or whatever. We were all in this together back then. That meant a lot. Those are precious memories to me. No one can take them away.

The noise is like a heartbeat now. Da dum, da dum… No that’s not right.

That’s why I went over there after lockdown ended.

Bang! Bang, bang!

Took you by the hand- or maybe by the neck- I can’t remember which.

Bang bang!

And put you in here.

BANG!

And I won’t let you out.

Disenchanted Failed to Enchant Me: Rewriting a Classic

I have to admit I’m not often charmed by (often unnecessary) sequels- BUT when I saw Disney were making a follow up to Enchanted, I was SOLD. Sadly, it didn’t quite have the magic of the original. As much as I LOVED the idea of playing with fairy tale tropes, fighting the stereotypical roles we find ourselves in, this was only ever close to being great instead of reaching actual greatness. What saddens me the most is how much more scope there was to explore the concept of being forced to be a wicked stepmother- simply because that’s what the story demands. I just *wish* this story could’ve been given the chance to shine!

… which is precisely why, instead of writing a standard review, I’m going to rewrite what I think should’ve happened in this movie (this is a story about wish fulfilment after all 😉) So hold onto your pumpkins, cos I’m about to bibbidi bobbidi boo this whole thing! (mice beware: I may be using a bit too much cheese 😉)

We’ll start in a similar way to the movie- setting the scene of the new life away from New York. Except I wouldn’t simply have them moving out to the suburbs to get more space- but focus on moving for a better life. That way, moving from New York can be for the benefit of all the characters. Giselle as the mother/stepmother is thinking of creating a proper home for them all, Robert as princely leader is stagnating in his life and Morgan as the stepdaughter has big dreams (which incidentally the movie doesn’t seem to be interested in exploring- we never get to see what this character actually wants!!) In the short term, Morgan will be leaving her friends behind (which we should be shown rather than told) however in the long term, she will be able to get the future she wants (perhaps by moving to a better school with more opportunities!) Of course, for the sake of conflict, Morgan doesn’t see that and is resistant to any type of change- even if it’s in her own interest. Leading, of course, to the big fight where Morgan calls her StEPmOthEr… Oooohhhhh…

Now of course that’s just the setup- jumping right into the catalyst where everyone is cursed… I think it would be so much better if they’re all aware of being forced into a fairy tale. Part of the charm of the original was their awareness of the fairy tale playing out in the real world- so why not do something similar here? Imagine how it would add to the comedy if everyone was singing and dancing against their will (think: Buffy’s Once More With Feeling).

Having everyone be aware they’re cursed also allows for a lot more conflict! They can all fight it out- knowing Giselle has inadvertently cursed them all (without being aware that Giselle is doomed to be the evil stepmother). Giselle is trying to tell them to make the best of being in their fairy tale roles (paralleling how she told them to make the best of the move) and they’re all compelled to go about their fairy tale day.

Of course, Robert will need a better arc. Determined to be the hero, this part of the movie can explore how he’s dissatisfied in his job, wishing to do something more meaningful (and we can leave out all that dull stuff about the commute). Similar to the plot of the actual film, it makes sense to show him sticking up for the little guy and trying to fight monsters (… I just wish that had some bearing on the ending… )

And if you’ve noticed something missing in my updated version- that’s because there’s something missing! I’ve taken out the pointless villainess. As fun as her musical number was, she definitely felt like a surplus character and her storyline merely bloated up the plot. I’d cut her from the story without hesitation.

That said, I would add *even more* humour! I’d take a leaf out of the Incredibles and have a magical baby giving some much needed comic relief. I wouldn’t just stick her in the cot and palm her off on some fairies, I’d have her wreaking her own havoc with that wand! (although maybe I would include some fairies cos that’s also funny 😉) We can even have a wink at the end for her keeping her magic- because why not? Besides, it’s not like she’s irrelevant to the plot- she’s what ties Giselle and Morgan and Robert together as family.

Now as Giselle turns into an evil stepmother (and Pip into an evil cat) I’d definitely have her make the choice to bring more magic into their world. It’s no good having it simply be a consequence of the spell. It’s far more fun to have Giselle deliberately trying to pull her old world into her new one. Symbolically this shows she’s trying to hold onto who she once was… which Morgan could recognise when everyone else thinks she’s a lost cause.

Thus the story can once again subvert a traditional fairy tale- Giselle is becoming beastly and only Morgan can save her from this final transformation. As the clock runs down, the villagers (led by Robert) want to destroy her, YET it’s Morgan who says she’s not going to let them slay her mother. Deep down, she realises that Giselle only wants what’s best for her. Protecting the Beast gives her a chance to turn back the clock and gives her just a moment to undo the spell to destroy Andalasia. They both have the chance to realise they were wrong and restore familial harmony. It’s not enough for the stepmother to merely say “you are my daughter”- she has to recognise she wasn’t treating her like a daughter to grow from  it. And likewise, the stepdaughter has to realise that she is loved and respect that love. That way they can stop the curse they’ve unleashed together. (See, I told you it was going to get cheesy).

In a lot of ways, I can see this is what Disenchanted was going for. It’s just a shame it got bogged down in some silly plotlines and became a little too convoluted. I’ve patched together something out of the ragged edges that could just pull it together…

But what do you think? Have you seen this movie? Do you think it worked? Or could you see some room for improvement? Let me know in the comments below!

My Reading Stats for 2022 – A Bookish Overview!

Yes it’s that time of year again where geeky bookworm girls get excited about stats… so let’s just skip the preamble and get right to the good stuff!!

Once again I’m realllly happy with my ratings. I mean, 3.7?! That’s way above average!! And I’d like to take the credit for this- but clearly the actual credit goes to the wonderful books I’ve been reading! 😉 (mostly I did also DNF a lot more books this year, which no doubt affected my ratings!)

The BIGGEST shift in my stats is definitely the steady decrease in YA. Year-on-year, I’m clearly choosing to read fewer books for teens (and is not that surprising considering year-on-year I get further from my teens 😂).

Amazingly there were no massive changes in the genre of books I read. I normally do see a shift here, so I was surprised to see no standout changes.

I also read about the same number of library books- at a whopping 76% of books! (basically libraries are my book-supply-lifeline and I couldn’t live without them!)

That said, there was one other MASSIVE change- and that’s the number of audiobooks I’ve read. It’s gone from a mere 25% to 48%!!!!!! That’s almost double!!! And to be honest, I’m not surprised by this shift. Not only do I think audiobooks are *AWESOME* (since I have (re)discovered the joy of being read to) I also know that I wouldn’t have done much reading at all this year if not for all the audiobooks I consumed (/devoured like a craven audiobook fiend).

So yeah, while a lot of things have stayed the same, there have been some BIG CHANGES!

Still, sometimes it’s the little things that count, such as…

Starting off this list with a small pleasure.

A HUGE slog (but not as bad as the last time! I gave it an extra banana… granted that was still only a total of two bananas- but that’s an improvement nonetheless!)

I’m pretty torn about this one, not because the book I’m choosing is in any way good (it’s not), but because I actually hated Time Traveller’s Wife more… I just couldn’t bring myself to finish it! So Constant Princess wins- purely because I suffered through it till the bitter end! 😂

This book cut DEEP!

23!! Isn’t that incredible?! (if you’re into DNFing that is 😉 ) Honestly, I’m so proud of this- you can read all about my DNFs in detail in my post!

12- way up from previous years! I’m super pleased about this, because I used to reread all the time and am resurrecting the habit. I feel like it’s a way to just show appreciation and love for a good book (and also rewarding myself with a memorable and comforting treat!) After all, what could be better than reading Lord of the Rings and Austen?! Somehow I managed to enjoy all these books more than the first time I read them!

(Granted on a funny note, I reread Looking for JJ and Selfie by accident cos I thought I’d never read them before)

Well duh!

Total waste of time. It feels like a book that desperately wants to say something profound whilst not saying much of anything at all.

I can understand this (considering I also rated it pretty high)

I quite liked this! not an amazing book, but it does what it said on the tin, so I think this is pretty harsh!

This was so hard to choose!!! I’m going to give you a few (you’re welcome 😉 )

This was a year of some super special non fic!

And that’s a wrap! So how was your reading year? Have your ratings been good? Did you discover any brilliant books? Let me know in the comments!

Favourites from 2022!

Welcome to the roaring twenties! This year has been a helluva lot more fun than, well, the years we were locked inside with nothing to do! I’ve been to shows in the West End, the cinema, the Opera House, gotten fitter, been on hikes and even been travelling! Most importantly of all, I’ve had a great time with family and friends and my new doggy pal ❤ I’m so grateful for that above everything else ❤

Here’s a quick whiz through some of the highlights:

And that’s all for now! Hope you all had a great year and wishing you all happy holidays!

My Thoughts on Consumerism in the Book Community…

I’ve often said that as an unhealthy habit, hoarding books is not as bad as it could be. There are far worse vices after all. I mean, they’re BOOKS, right?! They’re full of wonderful stories and knowledge and *feels*! And they’re not too bad to look at either 😉 So I am by no means critiquing buying books… that would make me a massive hypocrite if nothing else 😉

HOWEVER lately I’ve been wondering about the extremes of consumerism in the book community. I see people coveting far, far too many books- more than anyone in their right mind can afford. I see silly quotes online like “Before you turn 30 you should have more books than you could possibly read in a lifetime”. Not only does that fail to appreciate that most people don’t have that sort of disposable income, but it also raises the question: should we really be encouraging people to bankrupt themselves for books they have no intention of reading?!

It’s no wonder that people feel left behind. If you don’t have your own rainbow-bookshelf library, if you don’t have ten collectors copies of all the latest books, if you don’t have every. single. new release… well then you’re never gonna keep up with the Joneses, are you? And that will never do 😉

I can hardly blame people for deciding to forgo book buying altogether, choosing to utilise libraries (yay!) and go the minimalist route (oof). Something I could hardly commit to- I love buying books far too much!

And, to be fair, it’s not so hard for me to justify my purchases (I’m supporting authors! The editors!  The artists! The industry!) Sooo perhaps there is a happy medium to be had between coveting ALL THE BOOKS and stripping your shelves bare. Perhaps we can recognise that consumerism goes too far and also be alright supporting our favourite authors. Perhaps we can choose to be more mindful about the books that make it onto our shelves rather than just shoving another paperback on that we never intend to read just because it has a pretty cover…

Okay, who am I kidding? I still want ALL THE BOOKS! 😉

Well that was inconclusive on my part! Maybe you can shed more light on the topic- has consumerism gone too far in the book community? Do you try to cut back on your book-buying habits? Let me know in the comments!

Why I like absurd stories on occasion…

Last post I talked about some weird and wonderful books I love- so today I’m talking more about why I’m consistently drawn to unusual stories. From Alice in Wonderland to Endgame, these are the stories with staying power. I’m drawn to them for some inexplicable reasons… and some reasons I’m going to try and explain right now! Here’s why I enjoy some wacky stories…

They’re unexpected! And who doesn’t love *surprises*! (okay, I don’t always love surprises, but they can sometimes be a good thing- like a surprise puppy or a book you didn’t expect to be quite that good rocking your world).

 

Because they’re so different and stand out from the crowd, they’re all the more memorable. I read plenty of books I can’t place and don’t remember all that well- but unusual stories stick in my mind more (hopefully for a good reason 😉).

 

They take you out of this world- and isn’t that half the point of losing yourself in a book? One of the things I love about absurd or weird or strange books is how they force you to lose yourself in a truly fantastical reality. You have to forget what you know- or what you think you know- and accept the world the author is presenting you with.

 

And because of that, they make you see things from an entirely new perspective. When books are different, it’s a special opportunity to see the world from a whole new angle. It’s an opportunity to think and reflect on our own reality.

 

All this gives us greater clarity about the world we live in. Sometimes it takes seeing our world from the strangest of viewpoints to fully understand what’s going on around us (and then we realise everything’s just a bit nuts!)

But what do you think? Do you enjoy absurd stories? Or are they not for you? Let me know in the comments!

The Phonecall – an Absurdist Short Story

She had every expectation of a phone call that morning. Mouth still singed with coffee, she barely missed a beat when the buzz came and put on her best dressed smile to pick up.

“Good morning,” her boss said, without missing a beat, “I’ve been looking over your work for the last year and it made me think of promoting you.”

This was not what she had expected. “Oh that’s great news Mr Willoughby!”

“Yes- well I don’t like the way this is progressing so I’m terminating your contract.”

“Wait- what?”

Mr Willoughby sighed down the phone line.

“I can’t breathe,” she gasped.

“Let me explain,” Mr Willoughby replied coldly. “You see our company has all the power.”

“I see,” she stuttered, trying to regain her composure “so would it have helped if I asserted myself more?”

“No if you hadn’t been so polite and amenable and the model employee, we’d have fired you sooner.”

“That doesn’t make any sense.”

“I’m sorry it doesn’t make sense to you,” Mr Willoughby harrumphed.

“But I thought I was doing well- I passed my appraisal with flying colours- I don’t understand.”

“You don’t understand the company values.”

“How so?”

Silence.

“That’s just something we like to say when we fire people.” There was a pause down the line. “Look why would you think you had a place at this company?”

“Well… there was a contract? But I suppose that doesn’t mean anything.”

The rage was quick and swift. “How could you say that! Are you calling this company into disrepute?”

“No, no, I didn’t mean that. I suppose you were serious after all.”

“No, we always had our doubts about you. We think we can do better.”

“Oh. So, you have someone else lined up for the position?”

“No,” Mr Willoughby replied too sharply. “There is no one else.”

“But you have an idea of someone you’d prefer?”

Another beat of silence passed. “Look, we’ve said everything we needed to say. Your work was not good enough.”

“Oh god I’m not good enough!”

“I don’t understand why you’re taking this so badly- this should galvanise you to go and seek other employment. We could advise you about career opportunities if you’d like?”

“Oh no, please don’t!”

“There are lots of opportunities at our company- a position has just opened up in fact- would you like to apply?”

“This is insane- I’m hanging up now.”

Now it was Mr Willoughby’s turn to gasp.

“But I thought we could continue to share business contacts! I don’t see how that’s possible now!”

“No,” she agreed, calmer than she felt, “that’s not possible.”

Willoughby hiccupped, breathing heavily down the line.

“Are you… crying right now Mr Willoughby?”

“You were a wonderful employee,” he said, the sobbing intensifying.

“Okay, well I’m sorry it had to end this way, I’m going to go now.”

“Aren’t you going to tell me I was a good boss?”

She hung up.

The Town with No Name – Flash Fiction

Towns do not simply vanish overnight- at least not usually. Yet that is exactly what happened to the town of ——. Its buildings, its residents, its very name disappeared into the aether one yuletide evening.

Of course, for the neighbouring townsfolk of Runcold this was a massive inconvenience. Especially coming at such an auspicious time of year. Think of all the trading opportunities that were lost forever! Think of all the planned deliveries that would not be made! Think of the inconvenience! Everyone had their celebrations all planned out- and now who knew where to get that extra-special speciality that the town of —– was known for (and was now forgotten forever).

When the desperate nature of their plight was realised, the townsfolk tried all manner of remedies. With the guidance of the mayor, they held a candlelit vigil. When that didn’t work, they lynched the town idiot. And when that didn’t work, they went to bed early, as they often implored their children, waking up more refreshed than they had in years. But none of it seemed to do any good! The town of —— remained gone!

Grumbling at their hard luck, they all decided to go about their business and forget about the unfortunate affair. Until one day, as spring began to creak its way over the town border, a ragged traveller appeared at the gates.

He stood for three days, stench wafting into the town square, before the mayor decided to ward him off for disturbing the peace.

“Who goes there?” he said softly to the stranger, not wanting to cause any violent outbursts.

The stranger merely pointed to his throat, indicating that he had been robbed of words.

“Well, I’m sorry that you’ve been inconvenienced, sir,” the mayor went on, “but I don’t see how I can help you if you can’t tell us what you want.”

The traveller held a letter aloft, but when he slotted it through the gates and the mayor picked it up, the words on the pages disappeared.

Air rushed from his lungs.

“You’re- you’re from that town —— that town —–“

A collective gasp rose up from the crowd. Remembering what had happened to their neighbours, the townsfolk were suddenly very afraid.

“We don’t want none of your trouble here!”

“Go! Go before you do us in too!”

But the traveller refused to be turned away. He rattled the gates and he mouthed wordless pleas. Naturally, the townsfolk knew they could not ignore him forever. Unlocking the gates, they pulled him inside and strung him up next to the village idiot. Then they decided to move on with their lives. The town of —— may have been gone, but there wasn’t a lot they could do about it and they had no real reason to be concerned. Things would go on much as they always had. Sadly, the residents of Runcold never did get their much longed for presents.