You all know I really enjoy giving lovey-dovey suggestions- but I wanted to change things up this year and give some utterly UNROMANTIC suggestions!
You– unless you consider stalking romantic… But seriously, I love how this twists the whole rom com genre on its head and shows you the dark side of obsession.
It’s Always the Husband– because no matter how good you think a marriage is, if you’re going to wind up as a murder victim in a thriller, then it’s always gonna be the husband. Till death us do part and all that jazz.
The Catch– speaking of “too good to be true”, this book will have you questioning every single squeaky clean great guy dating your loved ones…
Rock Paper Scissors– one of the best thrillers I read all year, you’ll be in for a wild ride and left to figure out if love is all a twisted game…
The Silent Patient– and if you need any more proof of unhealthy obsessions going too far, then look no further! Incorporating psychotherapy and Greek mythology, this book will have you questioning everything. In a good way 😉
Frankenstein– I mean, aside from the monster, this has a pretty wacked idea of romance.
The Picture of Dorian Gray– learn to love yourself… and no one else! 😉
Wilder Girls– this is gory and weird and it even has a hint of doomed sapphic romance- definitely one to add to your anti-Valentines TBR.
Horrorstor– but if you need something a bit more straight-up-spooky, then take a turn in a haunted (ripoff IKEA) furniture store. One things for certain, the only concern you’ll have for your heart by the end of the night is whether you’re going to need a bypass.
The Sociopath Next Door– and if you need to be even more creeped out, you can check out some non-fiction on the real-life terrors in our midst (should probably add that this is statistically very low, but still, I’m gonna go for the sensationalised stats, since this is the season for optimism 😉)
The Prince– I mean, he does teach “it’s better to be feared than loved, if one cannot be both”- so I guess that rounds off this list nicely! Why woo someone when you can terrify them? I always think sneaking up on someone, putting your hands over their eyes and saying “guess who” works nicely 😉
Great Expectations– sometimes great expectations don’t pay off 😉 and nothing screams bad romance more than a woman stuck in a wedding dress for eternity 😉
Okay that’s my anti-Valentines list! What do you think? Will these be sufficient to put you off romance? Or do you have more suggestions? Let me know in the comments!
This is undoubtedly one of my favourite dystopias ever written. Conveniently for this list, it’s also pretty unromantic.
Nothing says *UNROMANTIC* like women being used as sex-slaves in a dystopian future. I’m not even a fan of this book- but I have to say, if romance is the last thing on your mind, then this is the book for you!
This is a more proto-feminist piece than the last one. But I recommend it if you’re not feeling the romance this Valentine’s Day because there’s nothing romantic about insanity. (Although I also recommend it every other day of the year!)
Speaking of insanity- how could I not recommend this book? I mean some of you might get turned on by electric shock treatment for depression (who am I to judge?) but for the most part, I’d assume this will put you off romance for a while.
Here’s another creepy one. Like The Yellow Wallpaper and The Bell Jar, it’s certainly got elements of madness. But, depending on your interpretation of it, there are also ghosts and mysteries in this one. Also, if you’re feeling in a more intellectual mood, then this is the book for you.
This book is technically a romance- but let’s face it, it’s also the most depressing book ever written. And if you want to shout “Love is dead!” from the rooftops then this book is the place to start. Or end.
To be honest, I could have picked any of the series for pure shock factor and because Martin can deliver a depressing blow to your favourite characters like no other author alive today. BUT obviously (for anyone that’s familiar with the series) this one has one of *THE* worst moments in the series, so I had to pick it. If you feel like being knocked for six, then this is the book to read on Valentine’s.
These short stories are retellings of fairy tales that are often creepy, violent and disturbing. I really recommend these in general- but even more so for an anti-Valentine’s Day reading party!
Okay, I’m gonna suggest something a bit different, cos I’ve never actually read this. Honestly, that’s because having read extracts and heard so much about it, the thought of it creeps me out- which is kind of why it *had* to be on this list. It is just so gross!!
Here’s another one I haven’t read. The reason for that is Irvine Welsh came to my Uni and read extracts from it and I realised it wasn’t for me at all. I was grossed out and horrified by it in equal measure. So yeah, I reckon this is the perfect book to read on an unromantic Valentine’s Day. I mean, nothing screams “I hate romance!” more than being horrified.
the orang-utan librarian 