I’ve been doing this for *years* now- doubtless my blogging grey hairs are showing- so it got me thinking about what it’s like to run a blog. I thought I’d share my “words of wisdom” with you all, cos clearly I know best 😉 Obviously, (disclaimer) I’m poking fun talking about my experience, so try not to take it personally (though of course you may very much relate 😉). Without further ado, let’s get into how to run a brilliantly bonkers book blog!
First of all, DISCLAIMERS ARE THE BEST!!! And everyone clearly loves them 😉 that’s why you doubtless skimmed my introduction and disclaimer 😉 We have to include them, because otherwise people get angry. But we also make people angry by including them. And anyone that was likely to get angry over what we wrote will ignore said disclaimer anyway… ergo feeling free to get angry. So, we’re off to a good start!
Now, when it comes to formatting your post, you want to make sure everything stands out. Use all the bold and underlining imaginable. And don’t forget TOO MUCH CAPS LOCK!!!! Oh and exclamation marks while you’re at it!!!! (And brackets work as an afterthought) (yes, I’m guilty as charged, whatcha gonna do about it?! 😉)
When it comes to planning your posts, it’s a great idea to stick to a schedule… which is why I never do. That way you keep your readers on their toes! Speaking from experience, people love to be frustrated with you and have no idea what you’re going to do next. It’s also great if you can disappear from time to time (with little to no explanation). Being flaky is the hallmark of being a good blogger 😉 Then when you come back, you can issue a ton of apologies, just to irritate everyone a little more 😉 I like to pull this stunt monthly- because I like to be regularly irregular. You’re welcome (and sorry about all this!!)
I also like to have a plan when it comes to posts… then change it at the last minute when you get a totally different (and hopefully better) idea (case and point this post came after I scrapped something entirely more sensible and probably more interesting 😉). It’s just a way I like to increase my workload. And not knowing which post you should’ve gone with is a healthy way to increase your own insecurities over whether you’re doing this the right way. Win win.
When it comes to reviews… do them… sometimes… Personally I like to several in a row, then none for months. It’s best to maintain your reputation as totally haphazard and inconsistent. (Of course there’s also loads of ways to write reviews, which I’ve already discussed, but the general idea is to shift gears all. the. time.)
Embrace your most obscure/weird/unpopular opinions. You can never be too opinionated! Praise obscure books and bash books that are really popular… that will make people confused and angry. Lots of controversy for controversy’s sake is always welcome! Remember, the more people that don’t like you, the better 😉
Change things up at random… people love randomness 😉 If you want to stop talking about books for a few months and go on about the eating habits of parrots… do that! No one will read those posts anyway- and that’s what you ultimately want! Bonus random points if you start a blog series, do it for a few months… then trail off unexpectedly. Because why should you finish something you started?
Decide you are going to make BIG CHANGES…. Then never do it! For instance, say hello to my little cartoon friend, who was absolutely definitely not going to star on this blog sometime in the near/far future…
Spend more time fiddling with formatting and unimportant admin than actually writing posts. Think of it as the ultimate procrastination- because you feel like you’re doing something, but aren’t really.
Also, come up with a million blog ideas that you do all the work and endless research for… Yet never commit to actually finishing. Juggle too many things at once- it just makes sense!
Chaotically switch up your social media presence. As soon as no one’s looking, I love to just d i s a p p e a r…
And that’s how I like to embrace the *chaos* in every area of my blogging. My god, after going through that I’m seriously grateful to you all for being patient with me…
What do you think of my blogging habits/advice? 😉 Do you have any “tips” to add? Let me know in the comments!
My Thoughts on Harry Potter– this was inspired by some comments on my 
Strike Out Tag– now I usually have a never say never attitude when it comes to tags HOWEVER as grateful as I was to be tagged for this one, I honestly felt these questions were a tad personal. And frankly it also got a little dark. To give you a snippet of what I mean, it had questions like “have you ever gone fishing” next to “have you watched someone die”- yikes! Still, it’s been taunting me in my drafts for ages, gonna have to delete it.
Drafts, Drafts and More Drafts– the original post by this name- I know, how meta is this post getting? Originally I used this opportunity to gripe about something blogging related. Unfortunately it got a little confused and I can’t really follow the train of thought, so I abandoned that idea in favour of this! Speaking of the blogging related…
How I Blog– such a pleasant title, such a crap would-be post. There was a part 1 and 2 as well and it was ready to go. BUT I was super cranky when I wrote it and it was basically a response to trolls (as I pointed out in my 
Triggered by Trigger Warnings– this will remain in draft form- partly cos I’ve more or less used that title for Gaiman’s book, mostly because the current document stands at 10000 words and counting. Somehow I don’t think this post is ever coming- it’s wayyy too long and complicated. One of the things that inspired me to write it was reading all the uninformed pieces online- yet while what I’ve written benefits from actual *citations* (*geeky shudders*) I do think that another inexpert view probably won’t be productive. I’m also frankly a little bored of the topic by now. Oh well, it was a good learning curve for me anyway.
A Post on the Gulag Archipelago– again, lack of qualification comes into it, but also HOW ON EARTH DO YOU SUMMARISE A BOOK LIKE THIS- ARGHHH?! (Genuinely asking cos I don’t have a clue) Also it was painful enough reading this let alone analysing (not cos it’s bad, it’s excellent, but it’s reallllly not a fun read). The thought of going through all my notes doesn’t exactly fill me with glee. That said I will try to put *something* together for it- even if it’s just an “I read it, you probably should” post.
Snarking on the Communist Manifesto– yes, you read that title correctly. This was something I actually just did for fun- yet reading it back got a chuckle, so I thought about sharing it- but no, this is so weirdly niche, even for me. (Plus it’s ridiculously long, cos it’s more or less line by line)
Are the Markets Really Free– WTF was I actually thinking with this one?!?!? What on earth!! Seriously I *am not* an economist. DELETE.
The White Heteronormativity of Classics– bahahahahaha not touching that one with a bargepole. What made me write it was an exceptionally daft comment (someone criticising Austen for being white and heteronormative *face palm*) yet it could basically be summarised in two words: *context matters*. Dear dear dear, moving on…
So one thing I’ve learnt from doing this exercise is I’m somewhat temperamental… although let’s be honest, all the banana throwing was kind of a clue. I guess I should invite more trolls to come on here and write the daftest, most-insulting comments and they can be safe in the knowledge that I’ll probably write a response to it that I’ll never publish. Come at me bro! 😉
the orang-utan librarian 