Book characters I would fight! – Inspired by Paperback Dreams

orangutan list

Not much of a preamble for this: I saw this over on Paperback Dreams and thought it would be fun to do. Especially after I’ve been talking about being all girly

orangutan in dress

I thought it was time for a transformation!

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I think you’re supposed to see a load of characters and decide whether you want to fight them- but I figured why not just take down a bunch of peeps I really don’t like. Let’s go for the traditional twelve rounds in the ring shall we…

Round 1

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Dolores Umbridge– she deserves a smackdown even more than Voldy- am I right?!

Round 2

game of thrones book

Joffrey Baratheon– there are a lot of villains worthy of being beaten up in Westeros- however I don’t think I could even manage to lay down the law with the likes of Cersei, let alone anyone else. Joffrey on the other hand is not only a total weasel, he’s also a bit of a wuss- I think I could take him

Round 3

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America– THE MOST ANNOYING CHARACTER EVER! Supposedly in the prime position to help save her country and marry a prince, this “charming” whinger spends three books deciding which bloke she prefers.

Round 4

new moon

Jacob Black– Ok I put him on this list knowing full well I couldn’t win. I dunno, I could distract him with pictures of babies and maybe I’d have a chance… see why I’d want to fight this one now?

Round 5

lolita

Humbert Humbert– speaking of perverts, this one would deserve it more than most. If I’d made it this far, I think my worry wouldn’t so much be his strength as that he’s a slippery snake and I’m not sure I could beat him there.

Round 6

hunger games

President Snow– I don’t think the odds are in my favour for this one- yet he seems keen on poison- maybe I could try that?

Round 7

armadale

Lydia Gwilt– talking of poison instantly brought this villainess to mind. Her villainy stems more from cunning, so I reckon this fight would be more about outwitting her.

Round 8

court of thorns and roses

Tamlin– moving on to brute force, I don’t stand a chance of winning this, BUT Tamlin is officially the WORST example of an alpha male in fiction and I gotta give it my best shot. Now, I recently heard Maas saying this was intentional and he was designed to be a douchbag (although, while I can rest easy in the comfort I WAS RIGHT ALL ALONG, it does make some of the things Rhys does in book 1 more questionable). Regardless, I reckon I’d even have the author’s approval for this one.

Round 9

tess

Alec D’Urberville– on a similar note, this guy is a douchbag and deserves a beat down.

Round 10

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Alexander– ugh this two timing creep perving on the mc totally deserves a smack round the head- at the very least!

Round 11

after the fire

Father John– because blech!

Round 12

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Scarlett O’Hara– this might be the least popular choice I make, cos she’s technically a heroine. But after recently reading the book, I had to go with it. Granted she could probably kill me (and doubtless wouldn’t blink at it) but she’s a terrible person and she’d deserve it.

Phew, that was more exhausting than I expected! And I think I got my ass whooped a few times there. But it was worth it. Do you agree or disagree with any of my choices? Which characters would you chance if you got the chance? Let me know in the comments!

Me In Book Characters Tag!

me in book characters tag

Hello all! I’m sorry I’ve been away for a couple of days and for being absent a lot last week, I’ve just been really knackered getting back into the swing of things after the New Year and a bit run down. I set aside a couple of evenings to bloghop and everything, but I fell asleep early instead…

you fell asleep

Anyhoo, excuse the preamble. I’m trying to catch up with everything slowly but surely- bear with me! In the meantime, I’m gonna chillax with a super fun tag 😀

Thank you so much to super talented Arwa @One’s Peculiar and the ridiculously fun Rebecca @Life as a Sports Fangirl for this one!

The Rules:

  1. Thank the creators of the tag (Us! Ash & Lo @ windowsill books)
  2. Thank whoever tagged you!
  3. List 5 book characters who you are most like and explain why.
  4. Tag your friends!

peter pan and wendy

Peter Pan, Peter Pan– I ain’t never growing up guys.

unseen academicals

The Librarian, Discworld– okay I may say more than “ook” and “eek” but I do actually have a lot in common with my literary counterpart- let’s face it, I go bananas over books for one thing.

Harry_Potter_and_the_Order_of_the_Phoenix

Luna Lovegood, Harry Potter– not only is she a Ravenclaw (#housepride) she’s also about as wacky and eccentric as it gets- which I really relate to. To quote Kaiser Wilhelm II “You English are mad, mad, mad as March hares”- which brings me onto….

Alice's_Adventures_in_Wonderland

Alice, Alice in Wonderland– this list is getting “curiouser and curiouser”- I’ve always really identified with Alice, cos she’s so imaginative and, let’s be honest, a bit of an insufferable know it all. Hey- no one said I should only advertise my good traits, speaking of which the next character on this list is…

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Smaug, The Hobbit– Smaug is my spirit animal. Let’s just say I can be a little hot-headed 😉

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And that’s that! I tag: Nel, Beth, A Book Calls, Melanie, Lucinda, Kat, Dragons & Zombies, Dani, Zezee, Emily, Katie @Never Not Reading, Anna, Cynic on WingsSamantha@Modern Witch’s Bookshelf and anyone else that wants to do it.

So which characters do you most identify with? Let me know in the comments!

Characters of the Year Book Tag

Because I refuse to let 2017 go apparently…

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Thanks so much to Modern Witch’s Bookshelf for tagging me to do this one- she writes super fun content, so be sure to check her out!

  1. Favourite Male Character of the Year 

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Just one? Argh this is so hard!! I think I’m gonna have to go with the indomitable Kaz Brekker (I just wanted to use the word indomitable)

  1. Favourite Female Character of the Year

bear and the nightingale

Vasilisa- I got into a whole conversation with my sister about why she’s such a great female character- she’s selfless without being a pushover, she’s enchanting yet not in a cheesy way, and she’s mentally tough as old boots. While she has some of the idealised nature of a fairy tale character, she also manages to be perfectly realistic, which is quite a feat!

  1. Most Relatable Character of the Year

furiously happy

Hmm I’m not sure that I read any characters this year that stood out as especially relatable, but I did find Furiously Happy relatable in general. Since this is non-fiction, I guess that means I find the author relatable? Although not the taxidermy- that shit creeps me out.

  1. Couple of the Year

Sisterhood everlasting

Lena and Kostos from The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants– yes I read the whole series this year- I regret nothing.

  1. Villain of the Year

midnight-star

LOOK AWAY EVERYONE THAT HASN’T READ THIS- but yeah, Adelina made a great villain. And she also (*massive spoiler*) had a great redemption arc.

  1. Most Disliked Character of the Year

wideacre

I HATED Beatrice from Wideacre *so much*. I’m not sure whether she was supposed to be the most detestable character ever written, yet that’s what she is. Hands down.

  1. Royal of the Year

prince-of-thorns

Prince Jorg! Hands down!

  1. Sidekick / Non Main Character of the Year

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Nighteyes- easily.

  1. Sibling of the Year

watching glass shatter

This is easy in terms of knowing which book has the best siblings- but hard given that all of them are so good!! I’m gonna go with Ethan though I could say any of the Glass brothers!

  1. Free Choice Award: create your own award! The Oh-My-Goodness-This-Character-Needs-A-Hug Award

wizard heir

Yes, I made that awfully specific on purpose, just so I could pick Seph from Wizard Heir- because oh my goodness he needs a hug.

For once I’m not tagging anyone specific, because I know how long it takes to get to these and it’s already 2018, so I tag anyone and everyone that wants to do this! Feel free!!

What was your favourite character of the year? Let me know in the comments!

 

Top 5 English Eccentrics in Books

Hello all! So after my post yesterday I started thinking very tangentially about the best of British things… and I came up with the English Eccentric, because one of the best thing about this country is the infamous English Eccentrics (yes other countries have interesting animals roaming about in the wild… we have peculiar and unusual people wandering about in wellies) And while I was musing about this over my cup of tea, I decided this would be a great chance to show the WORLD the kind of book characters that are Oh-So-English.

Without further ado- here are my top five favourite English Eccentrics in books:

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Mr Bennet– eccentrics are supposedly a little irregular and don’t bow to conventions- this suits Mr Bennet to a T. With his subtle humour and frequently disappearing off to his library, he doesn’t necessarily always act as he should. Still, he’s one of the most loveable father figures in literature and definitely has his family’s interests at heart.

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Dumbledore!!– Not-quite-a-doddery-old-fool, Dumbledore is one helluva wizard, with rather a particular taste in sweets. He probably should have told Harry what was up earlier in the story, yet I think that’s part of his charm (no pun intended)

Arkham cover D final

Lord Henry– outrageous, witty and totally outside the box, Henry steals the show as the voice for Wilde in Picture of Dorian Gray. And yes, his humour tends towards the more mischievous side, but we love him for it. (BTW the ’09 film portrayal *is not* the same character, so I didn’t use that picture)

aunt betsey david copperfield2

Aunt Betseyfrom David Copperfield I reckon there are *loads* of Dickensian characters that could fill this slot, I just happen to find her exceptionally wacky.

mort nice edition

DEATH– and not just any Death, Pratchett’s Death. I think all of Pratchett’s works are the blueprint for the eccentricities of his soul, so I can’t really put my finger on why this character calls to me as the best example. I just think that the little oddities of Death’s behaviour in the Discworld really takes the biscuit… or the curry (he’s a fan 😉 )

This is by no means an exhaustive list- who do you think is a great eccentric (English) character? Let me know in the comments!

Kiss, Marry, Kill – Book Characters

Hello all! As I mentioned a couple of posts ago, I’m currently on holiday, but I thought why should I have all the fun? I saw this ages ago over on angiebooksblog and thought it would be a riot to do- and it was!

Like Angie I’m gonna go with all male characters here- so let’s get to it…

Round 1: Edward Cullen, Jacob Black, Draco Malfoy

kiss-marry-kill-round-1

Oh dear dear dear… not a good start…

Kiss– Edward Cullen- ughh- I’ll close my eyes to protect them from all that sparkling

Marry– Draco Malfoy- well it could be worse…

Kill– Jacob Black- yeah it may surprise you that I think he’s worse than Edward Cullen, but he does frequently try to get it on with Bella without her permission and when she doesn’t want to. Plus he’s a pedo.

Round 2: Death, Gandalf, Walder Frey

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Wow- I could’ve had a younger selection…

Kiss– Gandalf- I guess a peck on the forehead will do

Marry– Death (from the Discworld)- he likes curry- I have high hopes this won’t end in divorce- til death do us part!

Kill– Walder Frey- there is no way I’m marrying or kissing this guy!

Round 3: Ramsay Bolton, Ronan, Vetinari

kiss-marry-kill-round-3

Kiss– Ronan- no complaints!

Marry– Vetinari- I’m sure he’ll trick me into picking him anyway

Kill– Ramsay Bolton- god knows he deserves it!

Round 4: Valek, Dracula, Darkling

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Kiss– Darkling- he’s not marriage material, but…

Marry– Valek from Poison Study– easy!

Kill– Dracula- I’ve always wished I could be Buffy

Round 5: Dumbledore, Baz, Mark Watney

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Kiss– Baz from Carry On– sorry Simon, I might have to borrow him for five minutes…

Marry– Mark Watney- definitely marriage material!

Kill– Dumbledore- I know this one’ll get me in trouble, but there’s no way kill the other two

Round 6: Richard III, Frankenstein’s Monster, Smaug

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Hohoho this is a bad crop!

Kiss– Richard III- I’ll just close my eyes and pray he doesn’t stab me in the back when it’s over

Marry– Smaug- he can protect me from Richard III! Plus he’s rich!

Kill– Frankenstein’s Monster- yeah I’m sorry I’m not into monsters

Round 7: Harry Potter, Prince Myshkin, Sirius Black

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Kiss– Sirius Black- no regrets!

Marry– Prince Myshkin from The Idiot– always been my dream book boyfriend- makes sense we’re finally getting hitched

Kill– Harry Potter- ermmm yeah- I may have killed the chosen one but I saved myself from a bad marriage

Round 8: Iago, Raskolnikov, Voldemort

kiss-marry-kill-round-8

Oh dear…

Kiss– Iago (he’s not actually a parrot)

MarryCrime and Punishment’s Raskolnikov- umm he’s not the worst murderer on this list, I guess?

Kill- Voldemort- yeah he deserves it- plus I killed the chosen one in the last round so it’s kind of my responsibility.

Round 9: Christian Grey, Theon Greyjoy, Dorian Gray

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All the Greys!

Kiss– Theon Greyjoy- well I can’t exactly marry the guy

Marry– Christian Gray- first may I say EWW- but even if he may be a stalker, at least he’s not a murderer

Kill– Dorian Gray- he does kill people, so I can feel pretty guilt free about it

Round 10: AIDAN, Joffrey Baratheon, The Hound

kiss-marry-kill-round-10

Kiss– The Hound- yuck!

Marry– AIDAN- this is weird- but I don’t think he deserves to die (sort of)

Kill– Joffrey- come on, he deserves it!

Gosh- that was fun- and admittedly a little weird!! Hope you enjoyed that! Agree or disagree with my choices? Let me know in the comments!

Not sure if this was originally a tag, but either way, I tag: Lost Art of Reading, Rivermoosereads, Martin, Never Seen a Nevergreen, Donna, Zezee, A Novel GlimpseFernanda, J J Azar and anyone else that fancies doing it!