A Quick Note on Dear Fahrenheit 451

To “Dear Fahrenheit 451”,

Yes, I am duty bound to write this review as a letter to you. Yes, I know it’s a cliché at this point- but it’s only a cliché because you made it so 😉

Firstly, thank you so much for welcoming me into your library. You made me feel so at home and I loved getting to explore the stacks with you. I had such fun hearing your real-life stories of what it’s like to work in a library (and found them far too relatable! We’ve all passed on a book a patron absolutely will not like!!)

What I didn’t realise when I picked you up was how this would read more like a story than a collection of reviews. As you weeded each of the books, I felt like I was going on a personal journey with you. And it clarified for me why weeding is simultaneously the saddest and most interesting job. Each story is full of memories and stories of their own- so it’s not a simple act when we send them off to live another life elsewhere.  Luckily, I don’t think I’ll be parting with you any time soon.

Above all, I appreciated your wit and humour. Your playful writing was so on point (I definitely chuckled at the line where you said you were “seeing someone else” with regards to Anna Karenina!) You definitely felt made for me.

I must admit, though I really enjoyed reading your suggestions for more books, I’m not sure we share entirely the same taste. But that’s okay- it would be boring if we were all the same and it was fun reading why you love and loathe different books nonetheless.

Once again, I want to say how grateful I am to you for keeping me company. You are an inspiration and a delight. I will be sure to push you into the hands of unsuspecting readers whenever I can!

All my love,

The Orangutan Librarian

PS: enclosed are four and a half bananas- I hope they’re not too squished!

Do I stand by my old reviews? Looking back on SEVEN YEARS of book blogging!    

Hello all! This is a post that’s been a long time coming- not least because today is my 7th BLOGGIVERSARY!!!! Can you believe I’ve been doing this for SEVEN YEARS ALREADY?!?! I certainly can’t!! And of course, that’s got me being all retrospective about my old reviews. Because written a HELLUVA LOT of them in that time!

Now, naturally, when I look back on my old posts, I have to admit I don’t enjoy it. Perhaps it goes without saying, they don’t ever seem as polished as my newer reviews. So, broadly speaking, I won’t be addressing that side of things (just know I’m *internally cringing* the whole time). I’m gonna be looking at the content and whether or not I still agree with what I said about the books. Wish me luck- I’m gonna need it!

(NB: The pictures will all link to the original reviews, so feel free to check them out for reference).

As I Lay Dying– I don’t care how many times a random stranger tells me that I “didn’t get” how genius this book is, I still think it’s shit and I stand by my review. It’s plotless, stuffed with uninteresting characters and pretentiously written. I do not think this book was “ruined for me” by bad teaching or whatever nonsense someone wants to throw at me- I just think it’s bad.

The Fault in Our Stars– I was almost too kind in my review… and I didn’t say anything positive about it 😉 Maybe I’d be more forgiving if this book didn’t exploit Anne Frank for clout… but it does, so I’m never gonna forget how pretentious this book is. Also, I once saw Green state in a video that he only believes in positive reviews, so I’m never taking this down 😉

Bronze Horseman– yeah this book still sucks. I definitely could have been more concise in my review- but I stand by the gist of it.

Throne of Glass– okay, now we’re getting into some juicy stuff, because we’re talking about books I liked at the time, yet no longer care for. Reading back these positive reviews feels a bit cringey. While I still stand by some parts- like the fact it was cool to have a protagonist who wasn’t a stereotypically “nice” girl- it’s hard not to think about where said character ended up (being a really bland “chosen one” stand in). I essentially stand by what I said, because it’s how I felt at the time, and I don’t think it’s fair for my current perspective to taint that.

Eye of the World– ahhh now this one is curious, because in an unbelievable turn of events, I ended up rereading this book recently. Annnnd I still had the same trouble with the writing and desperately thinking that the story needed editing. BUT there was clearly enough intrigue in the story for me to want to give the Wheel of Time series a second try. So, I guess I’ve softened with this one, recognising that I can see why other people like it.

Lonely Hearts Hotel– oh dear- this is one of those books I wish I’d never read. I don’t want to have written a negative review about it, because I feel like I was miss-marketed the story. That said, there’s enough objectionable content in the book that I have to stand by everything I said about it.

Woman in the Window– ehh, really hard one to talk about! I try to judge a book separate from the author as much as humanly possible… however I’d have to have been living under a rock not to have heard about what was going on behind the scenes! Aside from that, while I still think the writing was stellar, watching the movie and reading/seeing other reviews has made me rethink how well I rated this book. Despite the fact that I like the motifs, the story is just not that great. This is probably the closest I’ve come to fully wanting to retract an old review!

Maidens– still, there are plenty of times when I see negative reviews and don’t change my mind! Although this is a more recent read, I’ve included this because I’ve seen *a lot* of criticisms of this book and I just don’t agree. I find it a very richly written thriller with a dark edge, elevated by its mythological references.

Beartown– when I was planning to do this post, I was thinking about this review as one I regretted. After feedback, I felt like I was perhaps too harsh on the book and the way it handled sensitive topics. And then I read Night Swim. Unfortunately, I had much the same critiques, being frustrated with its take on the legal system and its desire to overturn judicial principles like “innocent until proven guilty”. So while I wish I’d handled the topic with more sensitivity… I still haven’t changed my mind about the actual book.

The Queen’s Thief Series– it’s not all bad news though! While I had mixed feelings about this series, looking back on my review, I found it to be pretty nuanced. It’s safe to say, I had a *strong* reaction to this series- and I think the review I wrote covers that! (in spite of my rather misleading title for the review 😉 )

Sadie– if anything, I wish I could have hyped this book more! Looking back on my super positive reviews like this, I TOTALLY stand by everything I said. My only issue is that I can’t do stories like this justice! They deserve more hype!!

And that’s all for now! There are so many more reviews I could’ve talked about, but hopefully I covered a good range! What do you think? Do you think my assessment of these reviews was fair? And do you ever change your mind about old reviews? Let me know in the comments! I’m dying to hear your thoughts on this!

Monthly Monkey Mini Reviews – May 2022!

I had a really good time with family and going out 😊 Shoutout to Macka B who I saw at the Jazz Café- I had an absolute blast!

And in other news, THANK YOU SO MUCH to the SUPER TALENTED SARAH for sending me this *gorgeous* Easter Bunny card! You have to check her out on her blog and Instagram because she is such an incredible artist!

Though I’ve been busier this month, I did manage to read more and I have lots to share 😀 So let’s jump into it!

Free Guy– what a fun, joyous experience this movie was! It’s kind of Lego Movie meets Truman Show- but not as dark as either of those 😉 I don’t want to spoil anything, so I’m just gonna say go watch it if you want to see a movie that’s funny, action-packed and heartfelt all at the same time! I enjoyed every minute of this!

Short and Sweet: 101 poems– here’s a very quick recommendation! I loved this small collection of poetry. Starting off short and getting sweeter, every poem in here lives up to the promise. Even to the last, which is the shortest and sweetest of them all 😉 Definitely worth picking up if you’re looking for a tasty, little morsel of poetry to tide you over.

Rating: 5/5 bananas

Island of the Missing Tree- I’ve found it! A literary fiction masterpiece I actually loved! It’s been such a long time since I discovered a literary fiction author I can get on board with- and Elif Shafak is certainly someone I want to read more from. If you told me before reading this that I’d love a book featuring the perspective of a tree, I’d have thought you were barking up the wrong, well, tree. BUT the power of this writer is such that she could enchant me from any angle. Her writing was so lyrical and stunning that I was transported through time. It took me beneath the surface, to the very roots of the Cypriot civilisation, intertwining current affairs and personal histories with ancient mythology. I could practically taste every description and feel every moment as if I was there. And, like waiting for the seasons to change, the story bears fruit with a most beautiful ending. It really was a remarkable book.

Rating: 5/5 bananas

One True Loves- I just loved this book. Very different to Reid’s more recent releases in (delightfully unusual) historical fic, this contemporary still captures the heart and emotionality and complex characters she is famous for. Like so many of her books, it has a melancholic beauty. Years after losing her husband in a tragic accident, Emma Blair is engaged again- the only problem is her husband has just been found alive and well. As you might expect from a premise like that, it’s emotionally very messy. And yet, appropriately so. It allows us to explore the question of soulmates in an unexpected way. For me, this is so intriguing as I’ve always believed in more than one “true love”. And I really like how this shows that every love is different and we are different in every love. There truly are many paths in life we can take- and they can all be right for different reasons. Using flashbacks, this also delves into the subject of grief, switching to second tense, which made me feel even more in tune with the emotions. In so many ways, this book is about fissures in the fabric of life and how we navigate when things get rough. Books like this show us that we don’t need to have all the answers. Oh, and that books always help 😉

Rating: 5/5 bananas

Sword of Kaigen– books like this are why I keep giving out all the bananas. Heck, books like this are why I keep reading. This is easily the best book I’ve read so far this year. And I wish I’d taken more note so I could give it the full review it deserves- but I was too busy crying for most of the story. Because oof- Sword of Kaigen cuts deep. More than a story about magic, this is a fundamentally human story. Set in a fictionalised version of East Asia, this saga explores the Matsuda family as try to defend an empire. And what may seem like a straightforward story soon turns out to have unforeseen intricacies and waves of emotion. Though it is a sharp fantasy, with a cool magic system, it is the characters who shine. Their relationships and actions carry the story to epic heights and (evidently) produced a storm of feelings. It made me gasp, it made me sob (a lot) and it somehow it also made me smile. I do not have words to do this book justice- read it if you haven’t already!

Rating: 5/5 bananas

Win Lose Kill Die– for some reason there’s quite a few YA books about teens who would kill to get to the top… I wonder why? 😉 With its ultra-competitive academic environment, I couldn’t help but compare this to the Ivies. But where that is a more satirical take, this one had more of a slasher vibe with a HUGE body count. And while I don’t always go in for that, I did think this pulled it off. I didn’t love the writing, with its references to pop culture (and Riverdale of all things), but there were some parts I thought were cleverly done (which I can’t directly mention for spoilery reasons). I did guess the twist very early on- but the red herrings definitely threw me off the scent! All I can say then is: well played!

Rating: 3½/5 bananas 

Traitor King– So, this was a rather telling book. This biography tells the story of King Edward VI- but unusually focuses on after he abdicated. And while I can give this credit for being fair and balanced, it’s pretty much impossible for me to be fair and balanced about such an evil, racist, anti-Semite. So I’m not going to beat about the bush with this one: I’m not here for the “he gave it all up for love” narrative. And I am sick of people like Netflix posthumously doing his PR. He was a selfish evil traitor, who supported the Nazis and blamed Jews for the war. He would have sold England down the river if the Nazis had won. He was openly racist, writing for instance:

“Those with experience of regions where the population is predominantly coloured, realise that negroes in the mass are still children both mentally and morally and that while these liberal socialistic ideas of freedom and equality regardless of race or colour may sound fine theoretically, the forcing of these theories are to my way of thinking, both premature and dangerous so far as the Western Hemisphere is concerned…”

This is the person the Crown chose to venerate as “inclusive” (somehow having a black servant makes you “inclusive”… incidentally Wallis fired Johnson for wanting time to look after his kids). It’s sickening to me that the Duke of Windsor was given such a sympathetic portrayal by Netflix. And that it completely ignored any mention of how messy their relationship was- prone to fits of jealousy and rage and affairs. Not to mention the fact that, politically, he thought England was behind the times for not already having a dictatorship. Reading this confirmed what I already knew: this was not the greatest love affair of the 20th century. It was the lucky escape from a despotic king.

Rating: 4/5 bananas

The No Show– this was a delight. Three women + one missing date = a recipe for another brilliant Beth O’Leary book! I felt like I connected with each of the women’s stories and fell in love in turn. Written with so much heart, this had me laughing through tears and hugging the book. I only wish I didn’t have to wait for the next Beth O’Leary book to be released- because this was her best yet!

Rating: 5/5 bananas

The Love Hypothesis– I theorised I would like this book… and I was right! This ticked so many boxes for me. Tropes like fake dating and secretly a sweetheart? Yes please! And I really liked the interesting setting and the fact that the female protagonist had *a lot* more going on than just her floundering love life. That said, there were a few things that kept this from fulfilling the perfect romcom formula. From a clinical standpoint, I never entirely warmed to Dr Carlsen and wasn’t convinced of his niceness. He was a bit of a cold fish and doesn’t do anything kind for anyone unless his (fake) girlfriend is involved (unless you count the car scene, which I don’t, because he came off as a showoff there). I don’t really love when a character’s only redeeming feature is that they’re nice to the person they want to sleep with. Speaking of which, I also didn’t buy the chemistry in the sex scene- it was weirdly chatty and went into odd anatomical detail… Not my thing! I wasn’t a big fan of the meta moments and wokisms either. Even so, my final hypothesis is: it was an enjoyable enough read and I’d happily read more from the author (if only that I might be able to work on my science puns some more 😉)

Rating: 4/5 bananas

That’s all for now! Have you read any of these? What did you think of them? Let me know in the comments! And I hope you all had a good month!

The Plot Worth Dying For…

Here’s a story that really takes the expression good artists copy, great artists steal to a new level. Washed-up writer Jacob Finch Bonner hasn’t had a good idea in years… until his student hands one to him on a plate and conveniently dies. It seems a shame to let such a good story go to waste, so he does what any *ahem* reasonable person would do in that scenario and helps himself. The only problem is someone knows and they would kill to get justice.

Naturally, reading the synopsis for this book had me instantly hooked. Because really, you can’t mess up a plot like this. Sexy and salacious, meta in an unusual way, it’s a story that comes to life right away. It’s a story many writers would kill for.

Of course, it’s one of the most unusual books about writing I’ve ever read- raising more than a few questions (and eyebrows). Wittily exposing the neediness of dejected writers, there is a humour to this dark narrative. There’s a sharp understanding of the pain that comes with failing to live up to your potential. And it stings, along with the carefully plotted out punches to the gut.

I found the voice unique enough- though with perhaps not enough differentiation from the original extract. Yet, that has little impact. This is a novel with a pulse. This is a thriller too original to beat. Even while I guessed certain outcomes, it’s quite simply a story that sells itself.

Rating: 4/5 bananas

Have you read this? Do you plan to? Let me know in the comments!

Monthly Monkey Mini Reviews – alrighty then, it’s April 2022!

Hello all! I hope you all had a lovely month… I somehow managed to get Covid! Because, why not?! My immune system is currently on vacation :/

I’m still not feeling great, so I can’t promise my blogging is going to pick up any time soon. I haven’t been reading much lately- but I did plonk myself in front of the TV for days, so I do have plenty to talk about on that front!

The Duke- when I was still able to leave the house, I actually went to the cinema for the first time in years! And I’m really happy with the movie I chose to see 😊 Lighthearted and full of quirky Britishisms, this movie was just the tonic I needed. With witty one liners and a stellar cast, this is the kind of old school movie that puts a smile on your face. Based around the slightly bizarre events of the stolen Duke’s portrait, it engaged with a deep (and also rather odd) history of political activism in the UK. Funnily enough, I feel like I’ve met a few Kempton Buntons in my life… even with him being a rather unique character! Definitely an enjoyable film I’d recommend 😊

Last Kingdom Season 5– and one of my favourite TV shows is back! And better than ever! Darker than its previous seasons, I did find some of this a little too upsetting for words. However, I also understood that this historical show does not lightly engage in shock value and only uses violence purposefully. And, even if it was hard to watch at times, I thought the story powerfully written. Unfortunately, this is the final season of the show… BUT at the same time as learning of this, I heard the fantastic news that its due to have a movie sequel to round off the story (which has already been filmed!!) Which is especially gratifying as the TV show was an epic conclusion to one significant storyline, while leaving another open-ended (this is very difficult to explain without spoilers- but you’ll know what I mean if you’ve seen the show!) Regardless, I am truly satisfied to see such a well-executed finale and very much look forward to Seven Kings Must Die!

Bridgerton Season 2– well, here’s a complete tonal shift: because Bridgerton season 2 was certainly a return to the frothy nonsense I’ve come to expect from the show. And nonsense it really was this season. As much as I enjoyed parts of it and while I actually preferred the love interests in this season, I did suffer from some severe confusion that the couple just wouldn’t get together for no apparent reason!! I have to admit, as much as Hastings and Daphne irked me more as characters, the obstacles to their romance made a lot more sense. By contrast, Anthony and Kate were a lot more likeable (no deception and sexual assault in their romance- huzzah!), but their love affair was so drawn out that it drove me a bit bananas. Still, while their romantic entanglement was at times more painful- involving a very unfortunate love triangle- I did feel it was all the sweeter when it came to pass. I have to admit that this series did make me smile and certainly lifted my spirits. Really curious who else is caught up in the buzz of this show 😉

Okay now onto the books!

Anna K- if you’re looking for something else in the Gossip Girl vein, then this may be just the ticket. A YA retelling of Anna Karenina, this very much embraces the maddening world of kids who are too rich for their own good. Full of just the right amount of angst and sanctimony, this somehow succeeds in modernising a book that very much speaks of its time. And I’m saying this as someone who is notoriously fussy about retellings. Very romantic and with careful attention to detail that brings these new variations of the characters to life, this is an unapologetically brilliant take on the classic. Bold and scandalous in equal measure, it does a fantastic job of showing how little times (and expectations for women) have really changed. I wasn’t quite as taken with the ending, though I did understand and respect the choice the author made. I’m not sure I’d read the sequel, but I do recommend giving this a go. Big thank you to Kat’s great review for making me pick this up in the first place!

Rating: 4/5 bananas

Poison for Breakfast- the best description for this book I can think of is: bewildering. I guess there’s only one way to describe this story- and that’s to say it’s about Lemony Snicket going on a journey. A journey specifically to find out about the poison he had for breakfast and (more importantly) about the process of crafting a story itself. I’m not quite sure what I got out of this story- but I do know that I fully agree on his opinions on how to perfectly prepare an egg (and that you should never trust a person who flips over a fried egg). Words of wisdom indeed. I did very much enjoy a lot of his references as well- even if I did not fully understand them. This was rather a peculiar experience of reading a book and yet being quite uncertain what I read. I suppose he moved the notes around and I came out of it somehow transformed. And that’s what I quite liked about it.

Rating: 4/5 bananas

The Maid– fair warning, this is marketed as a murder mystery and yet I did not think it all that mysterious. As a story, I was far more interested in the character portrayals and the protagonist’s found family. As a first person narrative, the audiobook had me transfixed. The style worked so well for characterisation, building the maid’s personality page by page. In many ways, it reminded me of Eleanor Oliphant, which likewise told of an unusual character finding her place. I think that, rather strangely, the actual plot was secondary to that.

Rating: 3½/5 bananas 

That’s all for now! Did you watch any of these shows? And have you read any of these books? What did you think of them? Let me know in the comments! Hope you all had a good month!

Excuse me while I ugly cry (over how good this book is!!)

List of all the reasons I loved this book:

  1. Written in list form, Quinn keeps a diary of all her deepest, darkest secrets… a diary that is now being used to blackmail her! Now she has to do what the blackmailer wants… before all her lies are exposed! I’m choking back the emotions this book gave me, cos as you might be able to tell from that description… it was a wild ride!
  2. Bold and different to a lot of other contemporaries out right now, this is a coming-of-age story for a new generation.
  3. Far from being a goody two shoes, our main character has a lot of growing up to do. And yet, that’s what makes her so relatable. Her journey isn’t about achieving perfection or being the best (amazingly this isn’t yet another book where the main character gets into an Ivy League 😉), but about her finding out who she is. I really appreciate how this book shows that it’s okay to make mistakes and grow from them, because life is a process. And your story doesn’t end at your high school graduation!
  4. Excuse Me While I Ugly Cry gives us a fair dose of realism, showing the complexity of friendship, romance and family relationships. The romance is cute and has a fantastic first-love feel. The friendships are explored with great care. And I especially loved that it didn’t give us the cookie cutter family image- it’s more down-to-earth than that.
  5. Happily, so many of the characters are humanised. Sure, there’s one or two irredeemable people in the bunch, but most have some humanity to them.
  6. There’s a lot about redemption and hope and growth in this book. This deals with difficult and significant issues in a grounded way. I loved the maturity and heart of the main character- and it was her attitude that was the saving grace of the story.
  7. Plus, we get to cheer on some justice being done by the end of the book!
  8. I can safely say I was delighted with this contemporary- it was one of the best I’ve read in a while!

Rating: 5/5 bananas

And that’s all for today! Have you read this book? Do you plan to? Let me know in the comments!

The Paris apartment was a très chic thriller

*Received from Netgalley in exchange for review, but all opinions are my own*

A locked-in thriller set in Paris- ou la la! 😉

Stuck in a Parisian townhouse with some dodgy rich characters, Jess is running out of time to find her missing brother. And in this creepy, claustrophobic old building, there’s more than a few secrets stashed away. Being a massive Francophile, I could certainly appreciate soaking in the French atmosphere. It was as heady and intoxicating as a good vintage.

Though very much grounded in reality, our heroine was reminiscent of Bluebeard’s wife, poking her nose where she shouldn’t. Finding dark and sordid details behind the wealthy façade. Shining a light on some serious issues. In many ways, it reminded me of Lisa Jewell, tackling something greater than simply a murder mystery. It showed the seedy underbelly of so-called upper crust society.

While Jess acts as our guide- the other characters are far from trustworthy. I thoroughly enjoyed how delightfully unlikeable they all were. D’accord, some of their secrets were a tad obvious- but others completely caught me by surprise!

I will say this was decidedly a slower burn than I prefer, especially giving the ticking clock element. That said- mon dieu! What a plot twist!!! The ending took me by surprise in a way I wasn’t expecting. It’s a very sharp ending.

And that’s all I can say without giving anything away, so I’ll leave it there…

Rating: 4/5 bananas

So, have you read this? Do you plan to? Let me know in the comments!

Night Swim Didn’t Go Absolutely Swimmingly

Darkly mysterious, this book simultaneously centres on a rape trial and a historic murder in a small town. Using the true crime podcast trope, this was perfectly suited to the audiobook format, with performances that brought the story to life. It seemed at first to be a smooth-sailing success.

A gruelling book, I felt sucker-punched by a lot of the subject matter. Which is as it should be- I don’t want another precious, artsy book exploring the subject. And this doesn’t do that. Showing not only the horror of rape in raw and unfiltered terms, it also explores the topic of how harsh the justice system is for victims and how too often public sympathy is with the perpetrator. 

However, as with a lot of #MeToo books, this falls into the ideological quagmire of opposing jury trials. Rather than suggesting support for victims or another practical solution, it rages against the concept of a jury trial as “archaic” (with the presumed alternative being the far more archaic “guilty until proven guiltier”). I just don’t understand why books like this want to fight injustice with further injustice. Arguing against evidentiary support is paving the way towards kangaroo courts and witch trials- as if those have ever ended well for any society. It’s not, as the book purports, the question of 10 guilty men going free- it’s a question of punishing hundreds of innocent people.

I also didn’t entirely agree with the way the book explores trauma. There is a fine line between recognising the damage done and describing women as irrevocably broken- and I felt this verged into the latter, implying there was no life after. It is a pity that when characters do speak out, only their vulnerability is highlighted, instead of their strength. I just think these tropes are so unhelpful for healing.

Still, I did like how this wove together two women’s stories- although how they converged at the end did raise eyebrows. I mean, aside from the decision to go and confront a killer (with only a phone between them… that they weren’t even using to livestream?!) And I also found the choice of villain realllly depressing- even if it was clearly signposted and made sense. I dunno, as the main character said, I wish it had been *anyone else*.

Now I may have flooded this review with negativity- but I really don’t think it’s a bad book. A lot of the execution was on point- even if some of my criticisms drown that out.

Rating: 3½/5 bananas

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So, have you read this book? Am I being overly critical? Let me know in the comments!

Monthly Monkey Mini Reviews – I’m Feeling February 2022!

Hello all! Long time, no monthly mini posts! But 2022 is bolting out the gate- so I’d better get started talking about some of the things I’ve been reading and watching! Let’s begin with the TV/movies I’ve seen lately- some of which I loved and one I LOATHED…

Cobra Kai– I was so so sceptical about this show. I thought it was just another cashgrab, deconstruction of a classic… but that’s not what this turned out to be at all. Because there’s so much depth to this story and it does every single one of the characters proud. It’s not simply a redemption story and it’s not just a way to ruin our childhoods by showing that the hero was really the villain all along. No, this shows that while the villain can be the hero of their own story, everyone needs to make an effort and work on themselves. Not everything is black and white. Not everything is as straightforward as it seems. This heartwarming show is genuinely moving. Plus, it’s also pretty kickass and crazy dramatic.

The Woman in the House Across the Street from the Girl in the Window- what a BLAST! Such a great parody of recent thrillers. It was very obviously side-eying the likes of Woman in the Window. Because of this, you can guess the ending fairly quickly- but that didn’t stop it being a joyous satire. It has some truly laugh-out-loud moments. In fact, every time the trailers rolled, I was chuckling to myself. And Kirsten Bell KILLED IT as the lead!! I will say it was a bit gory at the end- I couldn’t even watch through my fingers at some points- however this also gave me Woman in the Window flashbacks 😂

Don’t Look Up– look, if you like propagandistic movies by elitist schmucks who claim to be the “little guy” then… I don’t know what to say to you. Even if you’ve swallowed the Kool-Aid and don’t mind being patronised by a very-obvious-analogy for climate change denial, you may end up being bothered by how Hollywood acts like all these groups aren’t all singing from the same hymn sheet. I don’t know what planet you’re living on- but world leaders and celebrities and media outlets all seem happy to fly around the world on private jets to espouse the same “we’re all gonna die” talking points. I didn’t need to watch a boring, unfunny, hectoring movie to hear that same message from the same damn people so that they can justify raising taxes for the poor. Gotta love Hollywood- the moral arbiters of the world…

Once Upon a Broken Heart– ohmygosh, I’m so happy I picked up this book! I was hesitant, because, well, my feelings about Caraval aren’t exactly a secret. But this was EXACTLY what I needed. Fundamentally a fun fantasy, this fulfilled my every forgotten desire for YA. Playing with the idea of fate and gods in a way that is totally unique, this was a wild ride from start to finish. I loved the way the story starts so unexpectedly- with a HUGE blunder from our main character! This is just the kind of entertainment I was looking for and that I’d have enjoyed once upon a time when I was a teen 😉 I can’t wait for book 2!

Rating: 5/5 bananas

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I Have Something to Tell You– don’t bother reading this book. Unless you want to spend the whole time wondering what is even the point of all this?! This is a murder mystery that really isn’t much of a mystery at all… because *spoiler alert* everyone can tell who did it EXCEPT FOR THE MAIN CHARACTER (who also happens to be the murderer’s defence lawyer). And why is she the only person on the planet who thinks he’s innocent? Well, because he has sexy eyes. Greatest defence in history, amiright??! Seriously though, this was peculiar for plenty of reasons. Not least to say that it’s ALSO OBVIOUS that the main character’s husband betrayed her… not that there’s any point to that subplot other than to set up a terrible ending where the main character shacks up with the killer only to discover he was guilty all along. Gah!! And if you read all those spoilers, I haven’t ruined the book for you: I’ve saved you from wasting your time.

Rating: 2/5 bananas

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Six Crimson Cranes– ach I had such high expectations for this… but sadly this is the kind of book that didn’t quite float my boat. While it had a fiercely dramatic opening, it kind of slid into mediocrity after that. Possibly because the most interesting character (the dragon) was side-lined for most of the story. And once the initial conflict was initiated, it plodded along in a muted fashion. I didn’t really take to the secondary conflict… which is a big issue because (*spoiler alert*) that was the actual conflict. The potentially fascinating villain was just trying to help her all along (which is basically the worst trope ever)- replacing her with some generic fantasy threat I didn’t care about. And it used flimsy tropes like false memories in an attempt to trick us into seeing the villain in a sympathetic light… which still didn’t work since her actions at the start were the equivalent of kicking a puppy. That said, I feel like I’m the one kicking a puppy by not liking the book, because it does have such an optimistic view. It just left me feeling flat. While not a bad book, unfortunately the ending undoes a lot of what I liked about it in the beginning.

Rating: 2½/5 bananas

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The Man Who Died Twice– this was another pointless read I’m afraid :/ It felt like the author was just fulfilling a quota of getting a second book out in order to capitalise on the success of the first. There wasn’t enough about this book that was special in its own right to justify it as a sequel. Whereas Thursday Murder Club used the structure of a murder mystery to explore themes of aging and used the story to explore the characters in real depth, this felt like a tagged on overlong epilogue. And while there were still fun characters to work with, I felt like it missed the mark in terms of actually making me like the newer members of the cast and didn’t have the heart of the first book. And although the mystery was alright, I was frustrated that the disparate stories still didn’t connect. Irritatingly, all the things that I didn’t like about the first one were amped up (including the middle-aged attempts at wokeness and BBC-approved moralising). This was just an okay read- though I can imagine it being a fun TV series.

Rating: 3/5 bananas

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Poison– okay, I don’t normally talk about rereads here, but I JUST WANT TO RECOMMEND THIS BOOK (again) SO BADLY!!! This was one of my rereads from 2021- that I hadn’t planned on picking up again… if ever- because I just wasn’t sure it could live up to my memory of how good it was. And you know what? It was better. Not only was the tone utterly unique and stylised, but the characters were just as vivid and distinctive. The motivation and plot isn’t straight out of your usual YA fantasy. This takes stereotypes and twists them just enough to give them meaning and make them take on a life of their own. Wooding has such a brilliant understanding of life and stories, bringing them together in a magically meta way. This had even more clever twists than I remembered- so I’m glad I left it such a long time before rereading it. I almost felt like I was experiencing it for the first time, yet with a little hint of nostalgia behind that. I wish I could do a full length review- but I feel like it’s the kind of book that engrossed me too much to take proper notes.

Rating: 5/5 bananas

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Cytonic– now this is what I’m talking about!! While I wasn’t super blown away by Starsight, I had enjoyed Skyward enough to give the series another go- and I was so pleased that I did. As Spensa mentions herself, a lot of the second book was taken up with being a fish out of water, which didn’t really work for me, but this was a return to form. Action-packed and with fantastic character development, it kept me hooked from beginning to end… even in a super strange environment where it’s hard to get your footing. But of course, Brandon Sanderson is the master when it comes to world building! I listened to this on audiobook and found the reading mesmerising- not least because I already loved the voicey style. It made me fall in love with the characters all over again. A great edition to the series that has me pumped for the next instalment!

Rating: 5/5 bananas

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That’s all for now! Have you read any of these? What did you think of them? Let me know in the comments! And I hope you all had a good month!

Can I Interest You in Some… Crap Days Out?!

This book was the shit.  I looked at that cover and thought “this will either be brilliant or awful- there is no in-between”- and it turned out to be really funny (if you have a somewhat immature sense of humour). Yes, I get why this isn’t the most popular or well-loved books (just look at the goodreads rating of 3.13) BUT it’s perfect if you don’t take things too seriously. And it’s ideal for people looking for new places to visit in 2022… and need a list of places to avoid!

In this quintessentially British guide, you’ll hear about some of the worst best beloved places you ABSOLUTELY DO NOT NEED TO GO TO! Nowhere is sacred- not even our top attractions like Madame Tussauds and Stonehenge (honestly, I love both of those… though I can’t quite put my finger on why… something this book had me questioning!) It even gave me flashbacks to my childhood, when a misguided parent tried to take me to the pencil museum (even I don’t like stationary that much).

With hilarious observations about just how weird British culture can be, you’ll read this book and question your life choices and why you listened to me and titter at all our idiosyncrasies. I already know I’ve got one person to read this and regret it- you could be next!

I do have to admit, this fizzled by the end and got really repetitive (I have to ask the authors why they felt the need to put some of these places in twice?!) However, I can forgive it because I only have myself to blame for reading this in the first place and it was only delivering what it promised. Really though, I learnt a valuable lesson from this book (and can save you the time and money of reading it if you like): kids only want to go to Disneyland, you cheapskate! Gonna give this book a great big pile of bananas (even if the authors of this book end up writing a follow up book complaining about why all fruit are rubbish:

I may be the only person on the planet who enjoyed this book- but sometimes you love what you love! 😉 What’s the weirdest book you enjoyed lately? And… are you bonkers enough to pick this up too?? Let me know in the comments!