I DNF’d a total of 23 books this year. That’s right: 23 BOOKS! This coming from a girl who always felt like she had to finish everything she picked up, regardless of whether it was remotely enjoyable or not. But I’ve turned over a new leaf- as you can see! 2022 was the year I fully embraced the DNF- because life is too short to read every. single. book (especially when you don’t even like them).
Now, given the sheer quantity of DNFs, I’m not going to go into detail about every single one. A lot of them were simply too dull or too graphic or not what I was looking for. Empire of Pain was obviously too painful (I may try to pick it up again when I’m feeling braver). I kissed Shara Wheeler reminded me why I didn’t like the author’s writing style. And Shuggie Bain was just too gloomy. Still- there were some that stuck in my mind (for all the wrong reasons) and I just *have to* talk about them… Let’s get into some of those lowlights, shall we?
One to Watch– watch out- this one’s a little depressing. Which was a real downer, considering I was hoping for something light and frothy. I found it disappointing that the protagonist’s whole personality hinged on being plus sized. It kind of defeats the message of looking beyond appearances if you do nothing but focus on appearances. I just wasn’t getting what I wanted out of this book.
The Magician– I was so disconnected from this. There really wasn’t enough going on to keep my interest and there’s only so many times I can hear it repeated that the main character was not doing what his family wanted. I think there is a generational gap going on here, because some people really like (non) stories like this and I don’t get it.
Parable of the Sower– I held onto this book a lot longer than I should have, because I know what a brilliant author Octavia Butler is. But unfortunately, I don’t want to read a book about the end of the world right now (cos it feels like we’re living it! Perhaps (hopefully) something to pick up one day when the world is less grim.
Robber Bride– this is the one I had the highest anticipation for, because, while I didn’t love Handmaid’s Tale, I can see Atwood is talented and I really liked Alias Grace. Plus, I’d been meaning to read another Atwood for ages. But MY GOD the pacing. I don’t know what it is about the most acclaimed Atwood books not being my thing… but they are really not my thing.
Firekeeper’s Daughter– the writing style simply wasn’t for me. I was put off by the amount of telling- so much of the characterisation was written in a very basic way, in the vein of: “she’s my best friend, I’ve known her for years, here’s our entire history blah blah blah”. I also didn’t like imagined conversations to give us her parent’s backstory. Books like this have made me wonder if I’m even into YA anymore (which would be fair enough if I’m not 😜)
The Kingdoms– this was so unusual… perhaps a little too unusual for me. I loved the world building and the integration of Franco-British culture. Still, at times it was too strange for me and it lost me when it jumped back in time. I struggled to find my footing and then lost my way entirely. I read so much of this- nonetheless I couldn’t continue anymore. Time travel books are very hit or miss for me- speaking of which…
Time Traveller’s Wife– I wish I could go back in time and un-read this book. It wasn’t simply that I didn’t jive with this book, I actively hated it. Everything about the concept creeped me out. I just really don’t like it. Everything about the concept really creeps me out. I don’t like the paedophilic/grooming implications of her meeting her future husband as a child when he’s 40. It’s not cute, it’s creepy. There is the implication that this is all fine and dandy, since she makes the first move in the present, but that just comes across as victim blaming. She doesn’t have true agency- she was groomed from childhood to seek him out. I don’t even like when the main character meets himself as a child and gives instructions to have it be “our little secret”. Again, this is the sort of thing that groomers and child abusers do. I don’t understand why this book is popular, because I don’t find any of this quirky or romantic. It not only makes my head spin, it grosses me out. It would’ve been my least favourite book of the year if I’d finished it.
Babel– this was also a great big NOPE for me! Which was a real shame, as I was very much looking forward to this book. What I signed up for was a dark academia adventure set in 1800s Oxford… what I got instead was a plotless rant about history with a very basic linguistics lesson on the side. Not that it felt very grounded in history- modern phrases like “China is the future” and words like “diversify” aren’t exactly contemporary to the 19th century (which is rather amusing for a book about the history of language). Even for dark academia, there was too much focus on the academics to the detriment of everything else. Plus, for a book supposed to bring the focus onto the unseen in society, the characters read as flat caricatures. They read like stereotypes to me. And I knew the book wasn’t going to get any better when I was told, instead of shown that “he would have killed for any of his cohort”- without any evidence or action to back that up!! I was just supposed to believe they were best friends out of a couple of conversations!! Which brings me onto the awful amount of telling. Every single emotion was telegraphed through lines like “He was a child starved for affection”. Every. Single. One. I’m genuinely confused by all the people saying this book was beautifully written- because I couldn’t see it. I don’t care how popular this book is, I was completely fed up reading it and never wanted to pick it up.
Annnd that’s all for now! I’m sure one of those are bound to get me sent into bookworm exile! Sooo dare I ask- what did you think of these books? Have you read them? Did you manage to finish them? Let me know in the comments!
#1 FOMO– this is probably the biggest one for me personally. There are so many books out there that are acclaimed or a BIG DEAL in some way- and I can never quite forgive myself for not liking each and every one of those (ridiculous, I know! but that’s why I’ve powered through books like Dune, despite not liking the writing style from the start) A huge part of me always wants to know what the fuss is about and doesn’t like the idea that I’m somehow not getting everything I could out of books. If this is my sole motivator for continuing with a book I’m not interested in or don’t like, I’m just going to have to learn to let go.
#2 Because I like to persevere. For me personally, I have a very positive association with perseverance. I like to see things through, no matter what. So, if I give up on a book, I feel ridiculously guilty. It even makes me pick up books again, like Mrs Dalloway, long after I’ve DNF’d them!
#3 The shame– this is kind of a combination of #1 and #2. I feel an overwhelming sense of failure if I can’t make it through a book I’m not enjoying (which is rather silly, since this is a hobby, not a job!) I also don’t like the idea of admitting I couldn’t make it to the end of a book. Thus, I tend to power through, long after I should’ve just called it quits.
#4 For work/uni– of course, sometimes I am obliged to finish something whether I want to or not. And that kinda sucks, especially in the case of Lolita or even a Separate Peace, but it’s part and parcel of life- sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to do.
#5 So I can review it– this is in part another sense of obligation (though of course I rarely do ARCs and more rarely still dislike them). However, it also comes down to the fact that I take (a twisted kind of) pleasure in being able to drag a book I didn’t enjoy. And how could I review something properly if I haven’t finished it? Of course, I could just review what I’ve read so far or *shock horror* not bother to review it at all… which I actually do with a fair amount of books I’ve finished anyway 😉 (plus, if the reason I didn’t like it is because I was bored, I won’t have much to say regardless!)
#6 The occasional book that proves me right. We’ve all been there once or twice: picked up a book, found ourselves hating it, yet *miraculously* just as we’re about to throw the book at a wall or coming to the final act, the book rewards our patience and we end up loving it. For me, the most memorable example was Magician’s Guild– a book I’m still a bit meh about, but a series I’m crazy for! If I’d given up on that, I’d have really missed out (there’s that FOMO again) so with that in mind, I sometimes push on.
#7 If I really like the concept. This goes hand in hand with the last one. If I saw something in the concept and have faith in the story, then I’m going to have a tough time giving up on it (especially if it was super hyped!) I can keep going as long as I have the merest glimmer of hope (…which is sadly so infrequently rewarded).
#8 Some books are hard, but that doesn’t mean they’re not worthwhile. Similarly to #7, I do like to pick up the odd challenging book and that can have its downsides. A book can be tough for any number of reasons- difficult subject matter, complex writing etc. Often, it is for the best that I power through, even if I’m not enjoying it… but then, with books like Ordinary Men and Gulag Archipelago they’re not exactly meant to be enjoyed. And that’s okay- I just have to be a bit more prepared to persevere with those books and remember why I’m trying to read them in the first place.
#9 I may have been in the wrong mood when I picked it up. As a self-confessed mood reader, I’ve had this on numerous occasions. And it doesn’t help that I don’t always recognise what I’m in the mood for… or in some cases ignore my mood entirely. Recently, I felt like reading thrillers, but with everything going on I convinced myself I must want to pick up fluffy contemporaries. All this did was make me slumpy (and make me give up on two contemporaries in a row: Happily Ever After and V is for Virgin). What a waste of reading time!
V is for Virgin– annnd this one is straight up embarrassing. I DNF’d this shortly after Happily Ever After, not only failing to learn my lesson that I wasn’t in the mood for contemporary, but also going for a book by the same author (in fairness, I have liked her books before, so I imagined it was a blip). As with Happily Ever After, there wasn’t anything particularly wrong with this, I simply wasn’t feeling it.
Murmur of Bees– this is definitely a case of it’s not the book, it’s me. I can see, objectively, that this had beautiful writing and strong characterisation. I just… knew immediately that this wasn’t my sort of story. I struggled through about half of it, before realising I didn’t want to do it anymore.
To the Lighthouse– putting this on here is more like a promise to myself than anything else. As I’ve mentioned before, I never like stream of consciousness and so have always clashed with Virginia Woolf. This was no exception to that rule. A little part of me really thought when I put this down that it wouldn’t be forever. Yet, as I realised after finally completing Mrs Dalloway last year, that would be a BIG MISTAKE! For my own sake, I should leave well enough alone! So, for goodness sake Future Me, heed this list, stop whatever it is you think you’re doing and don’t pick this up- else you’ll make a liar of us both!
Wicked– oh man, this was atrocious. I *hated* the writing style and was bored throughout. I can’t actually remember if I made it to the end or not, but I’m counting it because I definitely remember abandoning it on several occasions (and if I did finish it I must’ve skimmed, because I don’t remember it!)
Mysteries of Udolpho– I picked this up solely because it’s referenced by other famous works… and it wasn’t anywhere near their league! For a book about mysteries and naughty monks, it was a very dull tome indeed. After trying to read a few very dull pages every few weeks, I realised no amount of cool points for reading the book mentioned in Northanger Abbey would make this worth my time. At least I sort of get the joke about people reading this sensational novel (it feels a bit like making fun of Twilight, maybe…?)
Otherworld– this was just completely meh. Other books have done this story better (try Ready Player One) and with more interesting characters (that aren’t simply obsessed with the length of their nose). It felt like a celebrity cashing in on a tried and tested story- it’s only a pity that they didn’t do a better job of copying other’s works.
Full disclosure: I could not finish this collection. I got about halfway through before doing the smart thing and giving up. Honestly, the main reason I gave up on this is that I wasn’t scared. At all. Not even a little bit. I have a hyperactive imagination, can be easily jumpy and so I am pretty easy to scare. And yet in this supposedly scary story collection, the bravest thing I had to do was DNF it.
the orang-utan librarian 