Honest YA Dystopian Book Blurb

(Un)inspired by the subject of my last review, I decided to write my own Honest YA Dystopian book blurb- enjoy!

This is one hundred percent about important issues- sort of…

I mean there will be an end of the world plot… even though the world already ended before this book began… But who cares? The world can end twice, right?

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Plus- get excited cos we have not one, but several oppressive governments nested inside each other like a Russian doll (really this book is a bargain- that’s why it’s £9.99 for a kindle edition)

And don’t worry about Instalove- IT WILL BE INCLUDED- we know how much you love it. And expect plenty of staring at the main love interest to- *lots and lots of stares*- to convey all the *emotions*. We wouldn’t want this “love at first sight” thing to be subtle. Also, we know this is important to you as a reader, so THERE WILL BE NO LOVE TRIANGLE (until book 2)…

LOVE triangle of doom

You’ve probably read about ten (better) versions of this before- but ho hum, what’s an eleventh gonna hurt? So sit up and take notice- cos I swear this will not be as exciting as the Hunger Games or Divergent (nor will the protagonist be nearly as kickass, but the narrator will tell you she is on countless occasions)

Also, if this blurb makes you *in any way* afraid for the main character, don’t be! We all know corrupt systems of government are totally useless at stopping teenage girls and their hunky boyfriend(s).

look at my knife.gif

Annd that’s it- you’ll have to read the “book” to know more  😉 Hope you enjoyed that! 

Oh Kill Me It’s The Killables

killablesC’mon, doesn’t that name sound like the worst boy band ever? I should have known what this book was gonna be like from just that title. But I gave it a chance… Why? I hear you ask…

Well once upon a time, before dystopias became a popular thing (aka before the Hunger Games) there was this great series called The Declaration. It was original, clever and had a strong voice. The series, unfortunately, went the way so many of its kind go- to the world resetting to its original state and basically undoing all the work of the story. But the fundamentals were still halfway decent, even if it did make that error of recapping too much in the sequels. So, in answer to the question I posed, I picked this book up to see what an author I had already been impressed with could recreate the magic she had made so long ago. Would she though?

Short answer is no. Not even slightly. This book sucked. The premise was something we’ve all seen before- evil society tries to eradicate evil… therefore becoming evil. The twist on this was totally lousy. Spoiler alert: they haven’t really eradicated evil, who’d have thunk it. And the conclusion was just plain dumb. There’s no such thing as evil… Ye wot?!

Add to that some lame ass characters and *surprise surprise* a love triangle and I am left wondering what on earth possessed the author. I mean, seriously? Why the hell would anyone think, after writing a successful series that wasn’t jam packed with tropes, that what they needed to do next was write the most cliché copycat tropeish nonsense imaginable? I just don’t get this one.

Conclusion: if you get the desire to read a decent dystopia pick up The Declaration, this isn’t worth your time. I gave it one measly banana.

hand-drawn-banana

Sincerely,

The Orangutan Librarian- reading shit books since 2015 so you don’t have to…

*Okay I’ve been reading rubbish books a lot longer than that- this was just my way to shoehorn in that it’s my bloggiversary- my blog is 2 today!!

 bloggiversary 2

It certainly doesn’t feel like it’s been 2 years (partly cos this is actually just the anniversary of my domain name 😉 ) but I just wanted to say a *MASSIVE THANK YOU* to everyone that’s been following along- whether for a day or for the whole shebang!!

Alright, now back to the book- let’s face it, you’re not gonna read this one… So I’ll ask a different question- what’s your least favourite dystopia? Let me know in the comments!